Juice time, yuh yuh, Juice time, yuh yuh...for the year 2G the rap game change for one name...Jewelz aim to slain anything on this plane...remains are found when the best kept secret get heated...you went platinum with a ghost writer so in the game you won you cheated.
Coley: Withers!
Tyler: Sup!
Coley: Not a whole lot, just watching people in upheaval towards Dana.
Tyler: *scoffs dumbfounded* What year is this? 2016, 17, 18, 19 also 20? You gotta be more specific man.
Coley: Yeah no people are not happy with the way he is commisionering the Ballinacup Tournament.
Tyler: *shaking head* what ever could be wrong!?
Coley: *laughs* many things! He's put Martin J Mush back in the tournament despite losing.
Tyler: He lost to Big Cat right?
Coley: Oh yeah, dusted!
Tyler: First round, yes.
Coley: Yeah so he's back in and beat Mantis today so he's now in the second round so he's 1-1.
Tyler: Wait so who was Mantis supposed to play?
Coley: Chaps.
Tyler: Did Chaps just not wanna play or he was just overruled by commissioner Dana?
Coley: Chaps showed up to his match the other day, never showed the table before they started playing and was like "you guys good?", they were like "yeah" and then he turned the camera around and was just placing the ball in the cups. *cracks up*
Tyler: *laughing* Listen, were there any rules against it?
Coley: Yeah no.
Tyler: Chaps is a lot of things, but he abides by the rules!
Coley: It's true! Yeah no one was like "show us your set up"
Tyler: Yeah! That was dumb dumb me, before everybody got on i'm tryna like size out the distance to show people. I'm like "this is 8 feet away, all my cups are set" *shakes head*
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: And I lost! So that's my dumbass playin' by the rules.
Coley: No, no I got a lot of people chirpin' me like "Oh how small is that table?", the table's a regular size, i'm much bigger than everything else people see on a daily basis!
Tyler: Yeah, how big are you!? Tableman!
Coley: *laughs* yeah, it would be me standing next to the door and i'm bigger than the door and people are like "that table seems awfully small"
Tyler: Yeah! Get out of that funhouse Mick!
Coley: It's like "whuhh, what do you want me to do?" and i'm shooting from like the other side of my house and people are like "way too close, he's just droppin' it in with that wingspan, what's he doin'!?"
Tyler: Mmmmhmm, yeah you're not slick.
Coley: Nothin' I haven't heard my entire beer pong playing life
Tyler: Sure. So Mush back in
Coley: Mush back in.
Tyler: Sure *shrugs*
Coley: Nicky Mush also in the tournament!
Tyler: Okay did he take someone's place? Or is he just?
Coley: Yeah I can't remember who's, somebody was just I guess being super difficult to book and get time set up and I don't know who it was.
Tyler: Mmm, was it my place? Wow.
Coley: Yeah *laughs* I have no idea who's place he took but yeah, Nicky Mush is in the tournament, and i'm pullin' for that one. The other one? Not so much.
Tyler: Are they on other sides of the bracket? The Mush brothers.
Coley: Do you think Dana even has a bracket where there are sides?
Tyler: *skeptical* Ehh, we get down to the final two teams and Dana's like "Nope, they don't play each other. I win!"
Coley: *laughs hysterically*
Tyler: "I beat 'em both cause i'm sick." *laughs holding up 1 finger*
Coley: "I averaged 12 and 10 in high school!"
Tyler: Yeah! *holding up 1 finger*
Coley: *laughs* *holds up one finger*
Tyler: Yeah I could see people bein' upset with that.
Coley: Yeah no, people aren't happy.
Tyler: I see he went to Jeff D Lowe commissioner school.
Coley: *laughs profusely* *absolutely despises this man and his Godzilla vendettas* Don't get me started with that heap of trash.
Tyler: *laughs mightly*
Coley: This guy yeah, I did a decent job of not even saying it was my team this week and Lowe's like "Coley I think you gotta win on your hands", i'm like what are you doin'!?
Tyler: Listen that is Jeff's signature, anytime we were on radio I would like come back to radio and he's like "Tyler I gotta tell you, if you don't win this one I don't know what to tell ya!", i'm like oh boy. Then he's like "okay who is the 32nd all time leading scorer for the Toronto Raptors!? Post ABA", i'm like *shrugs* Pascal Siakam? "I can't believe that you didn't get that one Withers! Wow!"
Coley: *Laughing the whole time in great disdain*
Tyler: You know, I had so much faith in you!
Coley: Yeah Siakam's 31 dumb dumb!
Tyler: I'm like Oh! That's Van Vleet! It's always Van Vleet.
Coley: *shakes head* Yeah i'm *shrugs*. I know I can't out funny any of the other people in that, and I know that no matter what, my team is everyone's just gonna vote against it, I don't know why! I don't know what I did to everyone else, I feel like I vote pretty fairly.
Tyler: I think it's just that we know nobody else is beatin' the mascots team. That's really what this comes down to. Like nobody's voting for like "okay if this team gets through they can beat the mascot team". Nobody's beatin' the mascot team.
Coley: *shakes head*
Tyler: *shrugs* That's just how it goes. I do have an idea in mind for next week, we'll see if I can get enough research to make it happen...to have them lose in the first round, but we'll see. We'll see.
Coley: That's what I mean, like typically I already have a team sent in by now.
Tyler: I went viral team which was immediately matched with the meme team, i'm like well great! Well great, that's just splendid! *laughing in depression*
Coley: *cracking up* Well that's part of the problem cause even like I had the same idea of the predators one as you.
Tyler: Right *nods*
Coley: Just with a different center than yours, but I had the Ork, I had everything. I had the great Chicago fire of 1871 at power forward. But yeah it was the same concept.
Tyler: *shakes head*. Wouldn't of helped
Coley: No for sure not, then I had the better cereal mascots. People were instantly were gonna vote against that just cause we're sick of cereal mascots. There's no winning!
Tyler: *shakes head* They going to the hall of fame, it is what it is, I can't wait for the Cereal Mascot team to also be the football team and also go undefeated. 6-0
Coley: Yeah that's what i'm afraid of. Maybe i'll just make that my first football team *laughs*
Tyler: Dig 'em quarterback, yeah. *laughing*
Coley: *laughs heartily*
Tyler: Jeff D Lowe's like "that's insane! they'll never win!"
Coley: Yeah, "he's got too much stickum on his hands, he's more suited for Jerry Rice"
Tyler: Dig 'Em Rice
Coley: Did you see that Tok someone sent us of Jerry Rice?
Tyler: No! Uh oh
Coley: Someone just tweeted us, it's him in bed with I don't know if it's his wife. I don't know if he has a woman?
Tyler: He married a woman to recite his statistics. That's really all it was.
Coley: *laughs* and they're just in bed, he has no shirt on obviously and she's just scantily clad as she's one to do.
Tyler: As women be!
Coley: Yeah and he's just *nodding back and forth*, it's like LeBron in the back of the car to whatever the song is, and it only shows her rack, that's it!
Tyler: Is it a good rack?
Coley: Listen, I have no qualms with the rack.
Tyler: *thinking, pondering* Alright Jerry Rice. He want me to like him so bad, but i'm not takin' the bait.
Coley: No watch the whole thing cause it's just a minute of it and it's mostly just him in it. Like it's not enough rack.
Tyler: I was gonna say if there's any Rice in it there's not enough rack, i'd agree with that.
Coley: Correct, correct. Uh, Drew Brees!
Tyler: Who!?
Coley: Just a wild, wild's the wrong word. A 24 hours in the life of.
Tyler: *shaking head* I was gonna say wild means nothing anymore man.
Coley: No *shakes head*
Tyler: This is gonna be like I haven't cared or even wanted sports to come back at all, but now with every single team circling the calendar for Drew Brees, I might have to get season tickets Saints edition or somebody who live in New Orleans to give me their log in so I can watch the Saints local games. I just wanna see him get massacred.
Coley: Oh i'm sure they're on national TV a bunch this year.
Tyler: Yeah but I wanna see 'em ALL
Coley: For sure
Tyler: I wanna see Thursday Night, Sunday Night, Sunday afternoon, Saturday Night I wanna see it all! I feel like probably the first game of the season, there's gonna be a series where his line just doesn't block for him.
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: And after that, they'll pick it up but for just one series he's gonna have to run for his life it'll be great!
Coley: *laughs* Yeah I already know, I think it was Demario Davis and a couple of other people were like "He addressed us all, we're in the process of forgiving him and what not" and it's just like I get it, teammates trying to win a super bowl, he's not gonna be there much longer.
Tyler: *shakes head* I don't get it! Do we know that?
Coley: Well he already signed the deal for that broadcasting shit.
Tyler: So did Cutler!
Coley: That's true. It's true.
Tyler: It's one of those things if they're gonna keep throwing 20, 25 million dollars at you, I think he'll just keep takin' it. I'll believe him in the booth when I see it. Like he'll be there eventually but.
Coley: If he just keeps losing in catastrophic fashion though, like how many times can he go back to that *laughs*
Tyler: Listen I'd love to find out, it's gonna make it particularly funny this year. I don't know how it's gonna happen, I don't know who. Losing to Kirk Cousins at home I thought that was the pinnacle now *thinking* Teddy B would be pretty good, like your backup whoopin' you in the playoffs.
Coley: Or keeping 'em out of the playoffs in like a week 17.
Tyler: Yeah either way, I don't know what would be better like to watch them go 6-10 but I think I want them to go 14-2 get home.
Coley: Be favorites.
Tyler: Yeah, get the bye, win the first game and then it's like "Oh boy, they had no answers for the Washington Redskins!"
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: "Haskins just ran all over 'em!" *laughs* Alfred Morris who i'm certain is not on the team anymore, ran for 170 and 2 tuddy's against 'em. And somehow they lose on a devastating questionable call!
Coley: That's the only way they lose. They're incapable of losing in any other fashion.
Tyler: I love that he's gonna retire with a ring and all the records and he is the what best quarterback of your lifetime? Not even of all time. Of your lifetime.
Coley: I mean Marino and Elway played in my lifetime.
Tyler: They're better than Brees, so yeah i'd put them there.
Coley: Peyton
Tyler: Peyton's better.
Coley: Brady
Tyler: Ehhhh *laughs*
Coley: Brady's got way better take on this than he does which is hard to fathom! *laughs*
Tyler: Listen...Grumpy Cat (RIP) got a better take on this than Drew.
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: I said he's gonna retire with all the records and not be in anybody's top 5, and people were like "he's not even top 5 in my lifetime". I was like listen, hey I don't disagree!
Coley: Not at all.
Tyler: Brady, Manning, Mahomes is better, Rodgers is better, Favre was better, Marino was better, Elway was better. That's what 5 or 6 off the top.
Coley: Russell Wilson?
Tyler: I'd take Russell Wilson over Drew Brees.
Coley: Did you say Rodgers?
Tyler: Yeah Rodgers is better
Coley: I'm not even trying to reach for any either.
Tyler: That's what i'm sayin' I don't wanna be disrespectful like he's a fucking dickhead but he was a good quarterback.
Coley: For sure.
Tyler: But just in terms of all time? He's gonna end up bein' Frank Gore man. Frank Gore's gonna be like the 2nd all time leading rusher and is Frank Gore gonna be in anybody's top 10 runningbacks? And I like Frank Gore!
Coley: He's not even like top 2 in that Miami backfield he was apart of.
Tyler: That's what i'm sayin' so!
Coley: Which is tough, I don't like that Frank Gore gets dragged into this
Tyler: I don't either!
Coley: I understand your point, but he doesn't deserve this!
Tyler: He doesn't!
Coley: He's just tryna tote the rock 3.5 yards per carry, that's all he's tryna do. He's not trying to hurt anybody.
Tyler: Listen, the ultimate compiler man. I will say this, Sean Payton, him too. That genius tag just last forever don't it! *laughs, shakes head*
Coley: *exhales*
Tyler: McVay's still got it! *laughs
Coley: His is still early, he could lose it still.
Tyler: I don't think he can!
Coley: He can.
Tyler: Who's got the tag that lost it though?
Coley: I feel like Shanahan.
Tyler: No there are people who still LOVE Kyle Shanahan, I don't think he will ever lose that tag. There are people that even after the Super Bowl I heard multiple Super Bowl people be like "he's still the best coach in football", and i'm like *looks around*
Coley: *laughs* First of all that's never been true!
Tyler: 1, 2, No! And again that's not to say he stinks cause he lost that game.
Coley: Twice!
Tyler: They're like "he's still the best play caller" except that time when he had to call plays to win the game and could not do it. Outside of those time, that guy he's a menace!
Coley: He's blown the 2 largest leads in Super Bowl history.
Tyler: *laughs*
Coley: 1 and 2.
Tyler: *laughs* Makin' that a 3 this year would be very funny, but here's the thing like there are the people like "Listen, he's blown those leads but how many people have gotten those leads!"
Coley: *laughs* I don't know a lot of 'em?
Tyler: Football writer twitter loves Kyle Shanahan, I don't think he'll ever lose them and he's also a coaches son, he'll never lose it.
Coley: Yeah he's got the coaches son thing so he might lose the genius thing but he'll always be coaches son.
Coley:
Tyler: That's the thing, I think they're hand in hand. Nobody's ever been like "he's a coaches son but he's dumb as fuck!". Nobody ever gets that. "He's an idiot! Rocks for brains!"
Coley: There's still a lot of people defending Drew Brees, that's mighty noble of you
Tyler: Listen the Klan has a voice too!
Coley: *laughs* I wrote a blog calling him spineless and silly me I went on to defend my point, which no one read!
Tyler: Silly boy.
Coley: Cause the reason it's spineless is you've been in a majority black sport your entire adult life, if you can't stand up for them now, when it's the easiest time to stand up for them, it's never been easier!
Tyler: Listen he's all about standing up!
Coley: *laughs profusely*
Tyler: There's no kneel in Drew Brees so!
Coley: No, no that guy loves a good stand!
Tyler: *nods*
Coley: And a lot of people like to point to the money he's donated. You can be a good person in some peoples eyes and still be wildly wrong about this, like the donating money thing, it's nice, i'm not gonna take away from him donating money, it's appreciated, good for him. The people who said he won a Super Bowl to help New Orleans get over Katrina, that feels like a bit much.
Tyler: *laughs* That's why he did it? Interesting!
Coley: Yeah I would argue the devastation he's cause that town since then with crippling loss after crippling loss since then has been negating that win for some time.
Tyler: I gotta say it's mighty tough when the alternative was like, boy oh boy if that onside kick just goes the other way? Peyton's just got 3 and I feel like he would just be comfortably considered the best of all time.
Coley: It would, that's the thing i'll always like the Saints because of that win like Tracy Porter i'll never forget that name. I'll always like the Saints because of that.
Tyler: That was a great team! A great year, it happened then and before Drew Brees started saying things it was like this guy's alright, hates his mom a little bit but he's alright.
Coley: The flag shit's just such a wild deflection and has been this entire time because it's literally never once been about that. No one hates the flag! In fact the very people kneeling and protesting all they want is for the flag to represent what people claim it represents, that's it! That's all they're asking for, it's that simple so when Drew Brees is like "I don't get it, i'll always honor the flag" No shit dude! A green beret, who was on KFC's radio show today, was the one who instructed this. That's where it came from, cause Kaep was sittin' back coolin' before that talk. He's like this is the respectful way. I've seen a lot of people point out, just in football in general, the ultimate sign of respect, when someone gets hurt, during a timeout, to listen to your coach, is taking a knee!
Tyler: It's disrespect Mick!
Coley: It's been engrained in football.
Tyler: Listen, my grandfather got hurt in the NFL! He watched 9/11 on television!
Coley: Yeah that Bill Burr rant is tremendous, absolutely tremendous. It's what we were talking about on last show, the immediate push back people have rather than listening and that's what Bill Burr was saying! You're not listening. It's that simple, you're not listening. You're immediately just "well the flag, oh the flag! We have to love the flag!" and Taylor Rooks was even just like, wait I don't even think it was her, I saw her say something but I don't think she made this point.
Tyler: Hmm
Coley: A lot of people and i've noticed this especially since the Kaepernick shit. A lot of people are in line buying concessions when that song's playing.
Tyler: Right!
Coley: Like they're not always airing it on TV!
Tyler: That's a relatively recent thing, yeah.
Coley: Right so it's like no one ever, growing up it was just like "can we get the game started". It had nothing to do with me disrespecting the country, it's like I came here to watch a game.
Tyler: Keep politics out of my sports, yes!
Coley: Yeah I don't feel the need to be doing this right now.
Tyler: I love the, "keep politics out of sports" but hold on lets pledge allegiance to the flag.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: To this material, yes.
Coley: So yeah to even bring it up and I know it was lead to him through the question "Do you feel differently now than you did then about Kaepernick kneeling for the flag?", I get that he was lead there but it's easy to be like "i've learned that it's not about that", it's easy to deflect that. To keep harping on it is just a deflection away from the actual issues and it's bullshit and that's why I said he's spineless for not standing up, because if you don't get it by now it's intentional.
Tyler: Correct!
Coley: You can't be his age, in football this long, in a city and state as black as Louisiana for this long and just be fuckin' closin' your eyes to this shit. It's intentional!
Tyler: Yeah it was Dragonfly who was like, "Y'all telling me Drew Brees can break down a defense in 10 minutes with his eyes closed and people were like "no it's not about the flag" and he just doesn't get it?". Come on man. Drew Brees is 40 fuckin' years old man.
Coley: Right!
Tyler: That's how he feels, we've known how he feels, and he doubled down on it and then in maybe the worst apology of the week, I can't say the year because there's been a lot of bad apologies, he's like "you know I can be a leader in the black community" like how many times do we have to tell you this old man! You just don't get it!
Coley: I called him Drewis Farakhan he's ready to lead the people in the streets! Thats where I knew too, if he had doubled down today I would of actually gained more respect for him because it wouldn't be this hollow. That's where I knew he'd be spineless, I knew this fake apology would come and everybody who was yelling at me yesterday being like "he's not spineless it took guts to say that given the political climate!". Well if it took guts, where the fuck were they today when he was backpedalin' like Deion Sanders?
Tyler: That's not guts.
Coley: Stupidity's not guts!
Tyler: That ain't guts, yeah *shaking head*
Coley: Even for him, somebody who has taken pictures with Trump like last fucking year. To do that kind of shit, him actually saying what is *air quotes* acceptable and the *air quotes* social norm right now still takes guts considering where he comes from and his clear views. Like that still takes guts, just cause it's easier now than ever, for him to change like that if he actually wanted to would take guts. But he's spineless, like I said.
Tyler: Yeah! He's like "Listen i'm very sorry you guys were upset by what I said. Listen my white grandfathers and NO ONE else's grandfather was out there fighting for this country and they all came back, they were all treated with respect". Like I legitimately know people, family members, friends of family members, came back from like Vietnam, WW2, spit on, refused service, forced to the back of the bus, forced to come in the back of restaurants. Like people I know, in my lifetime! So I can imagine what it was like in the generation prior to me.
Coley: The greatest Tyler! The greatest generation.
Tyler: Listen, they call it The Great Depression, folks, because it was great!
Coley: *laughs hysterically*
Tyler: *laughing* Anybody who pulls that card, it's like you think it was only your grandfathers? Also if you really really believe in this that that's what your grandfather was fightin' for, then what are you arguing about?
Coley: Right.
Tyler: Cause most of, I won't say majority but I feel like a good bit of the military folks that i've seen that appear to get it are like "listen, the reason I went over there was to fight for what people believe, even if I don't agree with it! I'm fighting that you have the right to say what you want if I agree or disagree, not only if I agree with it" and it's just like "No, my grandfather was fighting for what I agree with! They didn't like that shit y'all was fighting for"
Coley: It's also just such a hollow stance for people to take. Even forget the people who came back from WW2, Vietnam, the people who come back now and the state of the VA's now is despicable!
Tyler: It's deplorable dog.
Coley: Veterans get treated like absolute dog shit. Not even by people who are super anti-war just by society in general! So to only prop them up as this beacon of morality and then throwing them, casting them back aside right after you're done with your fucking sentence. Like "don't come over here!
Tyler: Yeah "we care about you, woah woah woah *leans back shoo's away* no no". It's the black communities thing, yeah you care about black communities when they're *air quotes* tearing it down. Yeah, you care about the troops now but when it's like every person I see on the streets is like former veteran with a sign.
Coley: Yeah. Like "I don't believe they're just using that to play on my pity! Why would I give them money!?"
Tyler: "My grandfather fought!" No it's like listen I feel like everybody to some extent has somebody who was in the services in their family.
Coley: Absolutely
Tyler: Grandfather, great uncle, great aunt somethin', to some degree. If you talk to most of those people and see how they were treated? Again, not even a color thing.
Coley: Right.
Tyler: Because black people were treated one way but then the white people come back and they're not getting benefits, these people are like mentally fucked up from what they did protecting this country and they come back to no help, no support at all and it's like "well no that's what they were fighting for!"...to come back over here and be treated like shit? That's what they were fighting for?
Coley: I know Chaps, it was either earlier this year or last year showed his call log. How many different VA's and what not he was calling just to try and get in touch with a counselor cause he just wanted some. Which should be much easier! I hope we can dig up the video, cause it was sickeningly long video of again just the calls. He was scrolling how many calls he'd made, people basically slamming a door in his face. That's what they come back to.
Tyler: Yeah. *nods* I was gonna say and this is Chaps who I won't say he's doing well but he's doing better than a lot of those guys you know what i'm saying?
Coley: For sure!
Tyler: So for these people that don't have the resources or the know how or even have the hundreds of numbers to even call like Chaps, they're legit like "I tried it a couple times and they wouldn't even give me the time of day man. I don't know what else to do, like I need my medicine and therapy for the physical shit caused to me by war, I need medicine and therapy for the mental shit caused to me by war and I can't get either of 'em.
Coley: Right!
Tyler: And now people care. People care when Drew Brees says we care but then tomorrow we'll drive by veterans on the street
Coley: The hollowness of the argument is like you don't actually care, you just want something to say in counter to what's actually happening.
Tyler: Yeah you don't care about the main point so you're pushing it to something else. Like you ask Drew Brees, okay how'd you help those veterans? "*leans forward* Those what now? Those who? Michael Thomas he's been here a couple years but"
Coley: "Yeah veteran feels strong!"
Tyler: "Yeah the kid's still young to me!" so it's all bullshit man, he knows it's bullshit. It's fine, we know how he feels, I don't need anymore apologies or double downs or whatever his team decides is the next wave of that. Now he can still give some money, I ain't gonna turn down his money...but it's Jake Fromm, you said what you meant. Elite White! You said what you meant *laughs*
Coley: *exhales* Did you see that one Sports Illustrated article from before the draft that was like "I think Jake Fromm's the next Drew Brees" *laughs*
Tyler: *exhales* Hey, somebody's scout deserves a raise!
Coley: Big time, on the fuckin' money.
Tyler: Nolan Ahraki's like "huh!? *throws hands up smiling* huh!?"
Coley: *laughing* Yeah tough week to be high steppin' that take but you know behind closed doors he's like "I fuckin' nailed it!"
Coley: Uhhmm
Tyler: So fuck Drew Brees!
Coley: The Jake Fromm one I mean *flabbergasted*
Tyler: That's Warner-Roberts bruh, Jake Fromm's from Warner-Roberts which is 15 minutes outside of Macon, Air Force base, Military base. That Warner-Roberts jumped right out of Jake Fromm man. He couldn't help it, he could not help it.
Coley: Yeah that was tough cause there's the old, old Chris Rock bit like "Give the guns away but make the bullets expensive as hell". Which was a joke and funnier back then when gun violence was less prevalent but he didn't say anything about "make it so only the elite white's can get it."...That's where it's like yeah you could make that joke like a full step behind where you said it, that's where you fucked up.
Tyler: Yeah elite white, boy oh boy I would love to see his criteria though. I would love to see who gets the pass.
Coley: Like listing elite whites?
Tyler: Like he's just going down the list, "Brees? You're in. Rodgers? Let me stop you right there my man, to the left to the left. *laughs* Richard Spencer! Come on in." Yeah elite whites, boy oh boy.
Coley: Yeah cause if that text would of came out and he was like "Yeah I still like guns". Like some people would of been upset but that wouldn't of been a real story.
Tyler: I saw he apologized but i'm past reading apologies. I didn't even read all the Drew Brees one.
Coley: No I got to the picture and laughed and closed it. *laughs*
Tyler: I was gonna say! *remakes picture with hands*
Coley: *laughs* Now if he would of posted the meme like the jacked black and white arms, I would of been like wait a minute.
Tyler: Yeah Schwarzenegger and Carl Weathers
Coley: Like wait a minute!
Tyler: He gets it, he gets it.
Coley: Yeah this guy, this guy might be a secret poster. But no him paying the 12 dollars for the shutterstock image and posting that, I couldn't get past that. That was a comically hilarious image to post.
Tyler: I'll say it would of been even much funnier if he would of found the image and just screenshotted it like that'd be better, but he's like "no no, i've got to show I stand with these people! $13.95? No i'll foot the bill, it's nothing!"
Coley: Well now i'm picturing he went to someone like "is this image good?" and they're like "no, no, no you gotta get the shutterstock off there, then it's good."
Coley: Like "Get the watermark off!"
Tyler: He's like *points to head* "That's why I pay you guys the big bucks!" *nodding*
Coley: *laughing immensely* What a dickhead, and then a lot of people like "a guy can't have a different opinion?". Well what's his true opinion? Cause it fuckin' flip flops every 12 hours now.
Tyler: Yeah that's a-
Coley: See that's where the spinelessness comes in-
Tyler: Right
Coley: If you can't even stick on, like if he had come out today and again just been like "yeah my opinion might be insensitive but where i'm from you just stand for the flag"...it's like alright that's what you believe we're never gonna get through to this guy.
Tyler: I'd still disagree but i'd say okay you standin' on what you believe to be true.
Coley: Yeah, and to be fair to him! He didn't technically apologize, he was like "i'm sorry you guys took it that way" *laughing*
Tyler: Yeah, "i'm sorry y'all got pissed off!"
Coley: "I didn't know! I thought people were gonna be cheerin' me in the streets!"
Tyler: Boy oh boy I gotta say @alltwentytwo did a build a perfect Drew Brees.
Coley: Oh boy.
Tyler: People @'d me and I saw it, there was one particular square on there I-
Coley: Top right? *laughing*
Tyler: Yeah! I won't write on it just cause I don't know that to be true and I don't wanna put that out there but listen every other square fuckin' killed me.
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: Killed me!
Coley: Listen that's square also killed me!
Tyler: It's one of those things where like "Huh! I hadn't heard that but *strokes beard* Huh!
Coley: Yeah listen do you think Drew Brees needs that to be true for him to think it?
Tyler: No *shakes head* heavens no!
Coley: Yeah exactly! That's why I believe it to be true!
Tyler: That's what i'm sayin' and also alltwentytwo he know more than I do about NFL, like NFL circles are pretty tight. So i've never known him to be a liar, i'll say that!
Coley: No, no.
Tyler: A jokester! But not a liar!
Coley: That was very funny, yeah build a perfect Drew Brees.
Tyler: Hysterical
Coley: *laughing mightly*
Tyler: *laughs*
Coley: Somethin' for a dollar was a big bargain! I think bottom right?
Tyler: *laughs it up* Listen I coulda built a great Drew Brees for like 8 bucks. 15 was a luxury! Man oh man, yeah he's gonna retire with 75,00 yards and 600 touchdowns and everybody's gonna be like no he was comfortably the 9th best quarterback of all time!
Coley: Matt Stafford and everything fell into place for him!
Tyler: Yeah Good Luck Matt Ryan.
Coley: Yeah bottom right for one dollar, finally gets to fuck the flag.
Tyler: I'll say this! He's a jokester, that didn't feel like a joke! I think Drew Brees has fucked the flag before!
Coley: For a dollar? Pretty good!
Tyler: Za'Darius Smith just posting the Monday night showdown, whenever that is, whatever date it was.
Coley: Yeah, it was like week 3 or somethin', yeah.
Tyler: I can't wait, 8 TFL, 3.5 sacks, 2 forced fumbles. Can't wait!
Coley: I saw a lot of, like a couple players mostly Saints players were like more okay with him after whatever Zoom meeting they held. But the rest of the league, like Jabrill Peppers was like "Nah we heard you, we heard you the first time."
Tyler: Say less, yeah. *nods*
Coley: Literally say less! Cause I know your favorite person, Kanye West said nothing but he put up a whole stack of Virgils.
Tyler: Listen, what you're supposed to do! Open the purse, shut the mouth. That's the gameplan right now, open the purse, shut the mouth, can't lose.
Coley: Right and that's someone who's lost so many times recently!
Tyler: Billions of losses! He opened the purse, he shut the fuck up and people were like "hey good on you."
Coley: Now by the time we're done recording this he may have gone on a rant of some sort and completely undo all of it.
Tyler: Listen no, I don't doubt.
Coley: But as of now!
Tyler: As of 8:52, somebody texted me "what about your boy Ye now?" I was like "listen i'm not gonna knock him givin' the money, that's a great act. That's a lot of money, like tremendous. But if you think this is the last we've heard from him on this?" *shakes head* That would surprise me.
Coley: *shakes head* but yeah it's that simple, if Drew Brees had just given money which he's known to do! Especially to New Orleans, it would of been like yeah great act and then someone asked him something and he was just like "i'm not speaking on this" it'd be like that's weird but alright it more than just flip flopping anytime there's a camera in front of you.
Tyler: OR! Dak did the opposite, Dak gave the money but then also opened his mouth *laughs*.
Coley: And the money, I don't like to say money goes to the wrong place often when people are donating...that one probably didn't go to the right place!
Tyler: You talk about read the damn room Dakota.
Coley: He doesn't even have that much money yet, where is he?
Tyler: He already got this next contract banked on, after he said that I guarantee, that contract gonna be done soon. I guarantee that
Coley: Yeah probably
Tyler: I guarantee, Jerry Jones is like "all that stuff was posturing man! 200? 250? What can we do to get this done!?" That's what, like even if you are the most Blue Lives supporter, I think the thing everyone can agree on...the police need MORE money! That's what the police have been lacking, funding!
Coley: *laughs* LA cut like 5% of their police budget so they're still over like 3 billion *laughs* It's like what? *laughing*
Tyler: Hey it's a start! We'll take it, it's a start but boy oh boy, you talk about that's gonna be some new automatic ass whooping batons! Speaking of meetings, did you see the Florida State stuff?
Coley: Yeah I don't know what that shit was, that shit was crazy!
Tyler: Apparently he said, I think Norvell came out and said that he spoke with players one on one which there's legit 90 players on a college football team. One on one that's just not realistic, I don't know why that's a lie you would tell. Then their best defensive player came out and was like "he sent a text, we're not fuckin' with that"...Then apparently he had a meeting and they're back on his side? So?
Coley: That's the thing I was getting most of this information, I don't really have a lot of college football on my timeline because I just don't really care.
Tyler: Sure.
Coley: So I was getting a lot of it from Bomani and cause after the meeting he was just like "huh?" because like you said a lot of the players were like nah we're all good over here and then there was one player who apparently even after the meeting was tweeting out Miami colors. So he was transferring immediately? *laughing*
Tyler: That's what i'm saying, I guess i'd just need to know what kind of meeting he had with these guys.
Coley: I think that may of been an actual miscommunication with the way he was explaining what happened which is why I think the meeting probably went pretty smooth. From what i've cobbled together he sent out like one text to every single player on the team, it was the same text. Then whoever asked him about it he said one on one when he meant to say like I sent a message to each individual member. That's where I think that meeting could of been smoothed over relatively easily.
Tyler: Right.
Coley: Yeah cause that doesn't even make any sense, it's such a weird lie.
Tyler: For a new coach even? Like come on man, yeah
Coley: Cause it could be debunked quickly that why I think he was just like "no, no, no"
Tyler: And also like, I don't know if he did or didn't like I didn't see the main guy, I can't think of his name but he had said
Coley: Like number 10 or somethin'
Tyler: But I did see a majority so I was like okay listen if the players fuckin' with it then it is what it is!
Coley: Cause they went from we're not even gonna look at weight
Tyler: Yeah we're done, i'm not lifting a weight till he's gone!
Coley: That would of been stand up!
Tyler: I'm not touching a football until then.
Coley: I won't even remember what sport I play until this is fixed! That was just so peculiar that something had to of just come across incorrectly. You know what I mean, that'd be the only logical explanation, cause you can't be a new coach with a wild lie.
Tyler: I sat them down, I gave them all 1,000 dollars cash, we're gucci yes!
Coley: All the players were like, "yeah he sent a text it wasn't like a one on one meeting!" So I think that's where he was just like my words got crossed I didn't mean that. Like okay.
Tyler: I meant slugs! Not thugs! Said coach Norvell!
Coley: *laughs* Cause you're right, that level of forgiveness unless he was just like Camero's for everyone! *throws arms up* Yay!!
Tyler: Like Oprah, everybody look under your seat! 50,000 cash.
Coley: Cause that could also smooth it over pretty quickly.
Tyler: That's what i'm sayin', whatever he said or did, worked!
Coley: Worked, yeah.
Tyler: Boy oh boy *shaking head*
Coley: Yeah that was a very peculiar story. Shoutout Ed Reed who I didn't even know had an Instagram account for, did you see that video?
Tyler: Of course! I see all my president's communications.
Coley: *laughs* Him bein' like "now there might be some kids who see this" and then the amount of takes he had to cobble a PG version of this was *laughs* He's like "called him a bitch ass motherfucker again, can't use that! *throws arms up*"
Tyler: I need the directors cut and I know somebody's got it!
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: I know Ed Reed's wife or homeboy or whoever was in that car got the rolling footage
Coley: Whoever edited it. Yeah I need the blooper reel.
Tyler: "This bitch ass!-" Cut! "What'd I say?!" "What, what'd I say?!"
Coley: He's like what!!? *laughing*
Tyler: But I will say this, it's something a little bit more hurtful being called a sucka than any curse word in the book.
Coley: *exhales*
Tyler: Somebody call you a bitch, that hurt. Some body call you a sucka though? That's rough. We gotta fight if you call me a sucka. Brees a sucka though so what can you do.
Coley: Yeah, that was my though process behind spineless versus pussy too. Call someone a pussy like yeah sure that hurts but Spineless!? "Like wha? I lack a backbone!?"
Tyler: You call him yellabelly, he woulda been on PMT tomorrow defending his take.
Coley: *laughs* standing, the whole time!
Tyler: *stands up*
Coley: *laughs* they did post, I saw a lot of pictures of him standing for the anthem. He looks like a fucking Doberman, like that level of intense.
Tyler: A boxer, yeah.
Coley: Yeah! Just the glare like an eagle! Like the way his eyes are fixated on whatever giant flag they have up on the jumbotron.
Tyler: He's just counting the stars everytime.
Coley: Yup still 50!
Tyler: *laughs* Yeah, none for Puerto Rico yet, good!
Coley: He's like despite my many requests to get Alabama taken off.
Tyler: No added twice! Along with my sensibilities.
Coley: Yeah true, I was thinking of a different Alabama *laughs*
Tyler: Mmm
Coley: I was thinkin' of Bessemer
Tyler: *shakes head* oh yeah
Coley: But yeah, fuck Drew Brees.
Tyler: *nods* Mhmm.
Coley: That's the thing I do think there's a certain amount of people who moved him higher in their top 5's after this
Tyler: For sure, and again that's how all this goes. Like you're on whatever side you're on, there's no on the fence here so you either agreed with what he said 100% or you disagree. I don't know anybody who was like "he made some good points, however". No, you agree or you disagree. You moved him higher or for me? I can't say he's one of the 20 best quarterbacks out of the state of Texas, personally. Dalton's better, Mahomes, I can't put Mayfield ahead of him yet but he's getting there.
Coley: You don't want to either
Tyler: I'm waiting for him to say some dumb shit.
Coley: Yeah he's been, I haven't heard a single thing out of him.
Tyler: Another one, probably for the best! Probably for the best. "Oh you think the police won't brutalize me too? I'll teach you! Another chip on my shoulder."...and even with all that I think the most alarming news I learned today is Kevin Durant is working for the feds man.
Coley: Oh boy, yeah that *laughs in disbelief*
Tyler: *shakes head* I couldn't believe it!
Coley: *laughs profusely*
Tyler: In a news cycle, like you and I and many other people have been Twitterized, like nothing we see can surprise us, shock us anymore and even then I saw dreadcraft tweet it out and I was like "wait *shocked* what?" like no, Kevin Durant is part of a tech fund that is a start up that is getting millions in government backing for surveillance and I was like "that's the type of tech investments they was using to get people to Golden State? Shit!"
Coley: You remember the drone from the super-villains balloons!
Tyler: Sure! *nods* Boy oh boy *shaking head*
Coley: Real super-villain shit.
Tyler: That's a bad look man
Coley: It's not a good look!
Tyler: For the most part I like Kevin Durant, for the most part i'll defend him cause I really don't care, like he argues on Twitter, I don't care that he went to Golden State.
Coley: Yeah that doesn't bother me.
Tyler: It is what it is. You funding drones being used for like private surveillance? That's problematic.
Coley: That's tough.
Tyler: I can't get jiggy with that man.
Coley: It's tough.
Tyler: NYKD, it's just too many good nicknames for him now.
Coley: I bet he wishes he just got Corona Virus and that was the only headline he made this year
Tyler: That's the thing, when you reply to every tweet, people don't even remember that he got Corona Virus! Him havin' Corona Virus, that wouldn't be in the top 100 things about Kevin Durant since he's like went to Brooklyn! *laughs*
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: So I can't condone that one man.
Coley: No.
Tyler: It's also like what type of money would this have to be making for it to be worth it to *emphasis* Kevin Durant!?
Coley: If I know anything about government contracts of which I have several, they are lucrative!
Tyler: I get it! Rumsfield Durant.
Coley: Yeah, Kevin Blackwater Durant yeah.
Tyler: Lockheed Martin Durant. He's gonna retire with what? 400 million from salary? From playing salary alone, another I don't know 150, 200 in endorsements. So what does this have to be worth for him to be like "No put my name on that shit!" I don't know...
Coley: Yeah and it's one of those things too where i'd like to know, what was he initially pitched on? I'm sure in Silicon Valley there's a lot of drone companies so like why this one, why did you pick this specific one? Do you even individually pick or do you have a guy who you kinda give your money to and he knows where and you're just an angel investor? However at a certain point when you do find out, cause you are still responsible at the end of the day for knowing where your money's going. So when you do find out, did he find out today like the rest of us? I find that hard to believe. When you do find out, cause that's the thing too, he does seem like very smart and knowledgable about where his money is going
Tyler: That was the whole thing! Like him, Iguodala, all these guys. They're like we're not just going to Golden State to throw out money in there, they're in meetings, they're pitching ideas so it's a lot harder to play that "Well I was just writing the check" when it's like, nope! The last 4 articles from the Times was like you were in all these meetings, you wanna know where every dollar goes so which side is it?
Coley: Right, cause i'm sure companies like that, I hope aren't like a day 1 "we got this idea, the government's gonna love it!". Like i'm sure that wasn't day 1 but at a certain point they were presented with that opportunity and they were like "Fuck yeah."
Tyler: I do think the firms were thinkin' that day 1, it's just one of those things, where did Durant come in?
Coley: Right
Tyler: Because it's like "listen, i've got an opportunity, it's a drone company, we just need a little startup and it's gonna make you 10x your investment" and he's like "oh alright cool, sign me up."...Uhh it's *covers mouth, talks through buried cough* government surveillance funding *coughing* it's private surveillance of all the people *coughing*...He's like "what'd you say?*worried look*"..."No I said 10% and we'll get you 100 back in 6 months"..."Oh, I'll sign up on that!"
Coley: Yeah bet.
Tyler: I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt again because he read every single Twitter mention, I hope he know where some of his dollar's goin'.
Coley: All of 'em
Tyler: You know what i'm sayin' so if he was just that "i'm a hands off guy man, I trust my guys" but nah he's "no listen bullshit9875, I disagree with what you said"
Coley: "I think government surveillance is necessary!"
Tyler: No that's the next thing from KD, he just pose a question. "So why's government surveillance bad, you tellin' me government surveillance is bad Sherwood Strauss?"
Coley: We're talking hoop man! We're not talkin' government surveillance here!"
Tyler: *laughs* "I'm talkin' the hesi!"
Coley: *laughing immensley*
Tyler: Man oh man, they was like "It makes EasyMoneySniper a lot less fun of an Instagram handle"
Coley: Yeahhhhh....
Tyler: *shakes head laughing*
Coley: Chris Kyle Durant!
Tyler: Ohhhhh *laughs* somebody was like "maybe that's what Draymond was yelling at him about." and then they sent the picture of Draymond with the rifle in Israel. *imitates Draymond with gun*
Coley: Yeah Draymond got him into it, "You're not putting enough money into the surveillance!"
Tyler: Yeah that's what that whole pointing in the chest was "I'm telling you, if you put 10K in now, you will triple your investment!"
Coley: *nods* "alright, alright bet" *laughs*
Tyler: *nods* That's what he yelled at him about when they snapped! "You pulled your money too soon! It's called angel investor, you're supposed to stay until the drones are in the air!" and then Durant left.
Coley: That's why he was on the phone with him after game 7, he was like "oh by the way you can play for us next year" that was thrown in at the end.
Tyler: It was the board of directors meeting *laughs*
Coley: *laughing* Yeah Draymond's like "I don't understand the timing of this meeting either but we're on the phone so let's just do it"
Tyler: Yeah no, "Look they said June 6th, 10:30. It's June 6th 10:30 *throws hands up*"...*laughing*
Coley: *laughing* "That's why I sped out of my press conference post game"
Tyler: "I said I was upset but really I had to dial into the Zoom."
Coley: We find out that's the box he was sitting in for that Oakland A's game, the game he was suspended.
Tyler: *laughs profusely* Yeah no, him just holding that gun in Israel with the BIGGEST grin kills me.
Tyler: *thumbs up, biggest smile possible*
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: *laughing* They're just like "this is the one we use to shoot at school children as they leave!" and he's just like "that is sick! With the earplugs?"..."Yeah no put those in, give it a try!"
Coley: "Yeah, there's some over there!"
Tyler: And he's like "this is awesome, I gotta tell Kevin"
Coley: Oh man remember when we used to do episodes about random baseball fantasy camps? Those were much better times!
Tyler: *laughs* Random you get to go to a country in the midst of civil war pick a side Fantasy Camp! Israel, Palestine
Coley: I'm gonna stop this conversation *cracks up laughing*
Tyler: *hearty hearty laughter*
Coley: Before it goes absolutely any further.
Tyler: *unable to physically not laugh*
Coley: It's like listen we've been canceling a lot of people this week, we didn't expect to be canceling the Mickstape guys. Find out why after the jump!
Tyler: This y'all? *imitates Draymond pic again* *laughing*
Coley: *laughing heaps and bounds* I wanna "this y'all" someone so bad, but i'm always late someone's always got 4,000 retweets by the time I see the y'all you're this'n.
Tyler: Man oh man, this y'all make me think twice before any tweet I send like "okay today is Thursday"...somebody like "this you? talkin' bout today was Wednesday 4 years ago?". I'm like that was me! I did say that! I'm done!
Coley: Holding a calendar yeah *imitates Draymond pic with calendar rather than gun*
Tyler: Withers, cancelled, Wednesday!
Coley: *laughing* yeah no its, people are diggin' up mugshots from local newspapers from like 7 years ago like this y'all is on a run like when the Miami Heat won those 30 games in a row. You can't stop this y'all.
Tyler: Somebody posted like "TIME: 2020 Person of the year- this you?" That's the TIME person of the year.
Coley: Yeah. *nodding* yeah they tried to do it to Wendy's and Wendy's was like *waving finger* no no no!
Tyler: Actually! *whistles* It's also, I won't say it takes away from it but yeah it's another Twitterized thing, like back in the day you saw something get 4,000, 5,000 retweets it's like oh man that's everywhere. Now everything gets 4,00 5,000 retweets. Everything!
Coley: Except for me! *points to self*
Tyler: Except for the Mickman. It's one where like I can't prove that they're fudgin' the numbers but somethin' changed. *shaking head* I don't know if it's the juiced ball era, the juiced tweet era.
Coley: Oh it is!
Tyler: I was gonna say, somethin' *shaking head* It's like when they switched the numbers, I can't remember if it was PER, it was somethin'. "Like Westbrook's got too many seasons in the top 10, let's tweak a couple of these numbers!"
Coley: Do you remember like FavStar?
Tyler: Yeah.
Coley: Like it used to show up, "Congrats on your 50 star tweet!"
Tyler: Yeah.
Coley: Congrats on your 100 and if you got like 200 it was like "holy shit that guy's going on Ellen!"
Tyler: "Will you sign this? Oh man!" And now it's legit i've seen tweets not even from LeBron or Barack Obama. It's like this tweet's been around 12 hours before I see it and it's got 100,000 retweets.
Coley: 100,000.
Tyler: And it's like, again one of these numbers is telling the truth. I just know before that same tweet it was like "Oh this is everywhere, that's got 8,000 retweet? Oh man! Incredible engagement!"
Coley: Fuckin' Andy Milonakis just got the 2nd biggest tweet of all time!
Tyler: How much was it?
Coley: 2nd most likes.
Tyler: How many likes was it?
Coley: Uhh, this information can be found *looks up tweet*
Tyler: Well I didn't even see the tweet, what was the tweet?
Coley: Uh so it was the day that rocket launched, and he said "Congrats to the astronauts leaving Earth today, you made the right choice"
Tyler: Oh okay I did see that yeah. Like a fine tweet! Good tweet, fine tweet.
Coley: Fine tweet.
Tyler: 800,000 retweets
Coley: 835,000 retweets 3.8 million likes
Tyler: *shakes head* yeah, like that's just some shit before like Obama or the Pope, somebody worldwide would of had to tweet it. It's the Drake streaming numbers now, it's like yeah he's got the most streamin' numbers of all time. It's like, I get it but I feel like it's more the era than the content.
Coley: Excuse me it's the 3rd most liked tweets of all time. The first 2-
Tyler: Ellen!
Coley: both by Barack Obama *laughs*
Tyler: Mm! Which ones? 1- Send the drones! A million retweets.
Coley: *laughs* Uh number 1, "No one is born hating another person because of the color of his/her skin or his/her background or religion." And then a picture of I assume Ghandi? *throws hand up* I don't know, who said that? MLK?
Tyler: *Drew Brees 2 Hands* The two hands like Drew Brees!
Coley: Drew Brees! Yeah
Tyler: *laughs* Tim Duncan!
Coley: That got 4.3 Million likes, August 12th 2017 and then "Kobe was a legend on the court and getting started in what would of been a just as meaningful second act. To lose Gianna is even more heartbreaking to us as parents. Michelle and I send love and prayers to Vanessa and the entire Bryant family. An unthinkable day" 4.1 million likes and then #3 "Congratulations to the astronauts who left Earth today, good choice!" Andy Milonakis!
Tyler: It's Obama, it's Obama and it's Milonakis! That's a, yeah, Drake has the most streaming of all time. It's like listen i'm just telling you if TomBroDude was putting up numbers in this era Skip Bayless, are you kidding me? He's Elgin Baylor! Tom 'Elgin Baylor' Bro Dude! He invented the style that everyone's running with right now.........and Dril.
Coley: I mean yeah, well Dril's been puttin' numbers on the board every era.
Tyler: That's what I mean yeah
Coley: Nolan Ryan!
Tyler: Yeah, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, just one of those untouchable all time career numbers.
Coley: Yeah you start changin' the rules, you start cancelin' people. I'm just gonna keep cruisin'
Tyler: Yeah I can't dunk cool, skyhook!
Coley: *laughs immensely*
Tyler: Yeah I would love to like legitimately know what changed cause something changed! I do like now that they count the retweets vs retweets with comments.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: That feels like a late addition, I do like that. I do like that you can click one place and get the retweets with comments because I think it makes a ratio even better.
Coley: Oh yeah I think I was the first one to point out that ratio exists with the comments.
Tyler: With the comments? Yeah, I think the first time I noticed what fun this was gonna be was the Michael Porter tweet cause it was like he's got a billion replies, 100 retweets without comments, 3 billion retweets with comments!
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: And then he changed his avi to the black power fist, listen shaming works. I don't know what to tell you, bullying works, rioting clearly works, protesting, it works!
Coley: Big time! They just reopened the case in Louisville, Breonna Taylor.
Tyler: Breonna Taylor
Coley: Yeah they reopened her case, they charged all the other officers and they bumped it up to murder 2?
Tyler: Yup. *nods*
Coley: LA is no longer enforcing curfew which I never understood why even fucking have the curfew if you're not gonna enforce it? I'm not pro-curfew but *laughs*
Tyler: Ahhh we heard it loud and clear Mick!
Coley: Just get rid of it! Just say that, there's no more curfew. That seems to be way easier than saying we're not enforcing it.
Tyler: I do also like the LAPD rule it's like "listen, now if cops see it they have to intervene now" it's like well that fixes everything! "Hey man, stop!"..."You right! I'm chillin'"
Coley: Was the opposite the rule before too? Like if you see an officer doing something either join in or get outta there!
Tyler: Yeah mums the word. So again, it's progress but we'll see how it's enforced.
Coley: Did you see the picture of the cops just stabbing and dumping out water?
Tyler: Yeah
Coley: Like the one thing i've tried to do more of is instead of just blind retweeting every image and video is actually do like that 1 extra, 2 extra steps of research because for both sides it's very easy to put out misinformation.
Tyler: It's also very dangerous at a time like this.
Coley: Super dangerous! Like the dude who got his ass whooped for swingin' that sword around, I still see people being like "he was just protecting his business" despite the fact that he himself has come out and said not to be true!
Tyler: He was like "oh I was chasin' em and they put hands and feet on my stupid ass! It's true! It's true!"
Coley: But people saw that originally and heard that originally and they'll never get that corrected in some peoples minds.
Tyler: Right, right.
Coley: So i'm trying to take it one or two extra steps to be like, alright maybe there was something that happened that I just don't know.
Tyler: It's also old footage going around and i've been guilty of it too, I retweeted one or two things and I was seein' people be like "that's an old video" and I look and see and like "fuck that was an old video". So yeah i'm guilty of it too but i'm trying to be more mindful of that.
Coley: But when I see an image like that and I even take those extra steps like I haven't seen the other side answer to what that possibly could be. Other than just like inhumane, that's the part where it doesn't feel like the other side is even human.
Tyler: It's how they feel, when they feel the other side is not human. That's how that comes in because it's one thing, people are like "aye y'all was mad at people destroying property" they breakin' up tables, pourin' out water and again, Flint and other cities alone I just see it's one of those "okay we're cops, we're dickheads, we're just gonna take this water from these people". You're just gonna stab it and pour it? Like come on man. Even if you were like "no, we're takin' this and leavin' it in the street, somebody can have it but you can't!"
Coley: Right! *Nodding profusely*
Tyler: But no! They're doing that, I saw them like spray paintin' cars to tag people like "okay that car's got a blue tag on it, you were at the protest? Bet. We'll pull you over for a bad taillight or something like that."
Coley: Right.
Tyler: I don't like it.
Coley: No!
Tyler: Personal opinion!
Coley: No, I think it's bad. That's been my stance. I don't want anyone "This you, me dumping out a bunch of water" *laughs* but it's just like that's a level of-
Tyler: That's evil, that's all it is. Evil.
Coley: It's so evil, cause like
Tyler: There's nothing policing about it, there's nothing protecting. Even if you believe in the utmost, they're here to protect and serve and who would you call if your house got broken into, there's nothing protective and serving about literally knifing water bottles literally in packages, like still in the 24 pack.
Coley: Right you could return it to the store that's how in tact it still is.
Tyler: Dude like take it back to the precinct, somebody-
Coley: You drink it!
Tyler: Yeah! Drink all 24 bottles right now, i'd rather you do that than one gut it in the street and then just leave the trash plastic.
Coley: Yeah i've seen people bein' like "those aren't even water! It's the fluid for a Molotov Cocktail!" There's been a lot of Molotov Cocktail talk!
Tyler: Mmmm Deer Park Molotov Cocktails yeah!
Coley: *bursts out laughing* It's like what the fuck are people talking about. Like what are you talking about?
Tyler: I do think it's one of those things, if you've legit never had one, any experience with the police or two, any bad experience with the police this is how they're hyped up in your mind.
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: And ideally, we'd all like to think we're that way that hey are here to find the bad guys, regardless of color they are here to protect and to serve and it's like the guys who have had these experiences, lived these experiences, seen these experiences, lived this all their life are like that's just not true. It's just not true and even you see it now, all the-, that's another thing I won't tell people what to retweet but please be mindful of retweeting these cops dancing with people or kneeling with people because every time they're like "listen they cut the cameras off and they whooped our ass. They tear gassed us" like they're tear gassing people in the midst of a pandemic which effects your respiratory system. *emphasis* That's evil! *slams hand on table* That's just evil! There's not another way around it. That's just evil. And I don't like it! Again, i'll say it again.
Coley: Yeah no *shaking head* I was worried you were gonna say you were pro-
Tyler: However! *holds one finger up*
Coley: TylerIAmKevinDurant.
Tyler: *cracks up* TylerIAmSurveilling yeah
Coley: *cracks up* At all hours, from all angles. What if Kevin Durant came out and said, "The only reason I wanna have surveillance on anyone is that fuckface Ethan Strauss." *laughs*
Tyler: Listen i'd be like points were made, okay. I disagree with-
Coley: *mockingly Straussy* "I'm Kevin Durant and i've got government surveillance funding" *laughs*
Tyler: Please, somebody hasn't done the voice recording of that. If I knew how I would, it's so disrespectful dude.*shaking head*
Coley: *laughing hysterically*
Tyler: It's one of those things, you know how bad a white guy doin' a black voice, but it's not racist at all and it's still that disrespectful! *mockingly white* "Muh Muh, i'm 7 foot and I shoot 3 pointes muh muh muh" *shakes head* i'm like he should whoop yo ass. *shakes head smiling*
Coley: To be disrespectful and not racist is *throws hand up* impossible to pull off!
Tyler: Dickhead vibe? Nailed it! If he's like "I didn't invest in a drone company, I invested in 1 *holds up 1 finger* with Sherwood Strauss's name on it!" I'm like listen "i've got nothin' I was wrong here, go right ahead. I apologize"
Coley: *laughing* we'll leave you to your business!
Tyler: Then it turns into we're all just recreating Kevin Durant's best tweets but including surveillance tweet, it was a good time. It was a good time.
Coley: Ah man. *smoothest transition in the history of ad reads!*
[Ad Read 1]
Coley: Tyler what was your first experience you can recall with cologne?
Tyler: *exhales* I remember we had a dance, I think it was 2nd or 3rd grade and I remember-
Coley: That young!?
Tyler: Oh yeah I had no cologne for myself you understand but I was like this is a thing that people wear to smell good, I need to smell good! My old man was like "say less" and he went to the bathroom cabinet I was never allowed to go in, got me a little somethin', hit me behind the ears, neck, wrist and then when he was gone I hit like another couple extra sprays cause as a kid-
Coley: Pour it down your pants
Tyler: there's no such thing as too much cologne as a kid. You spray it, walk in it, I drank it and I went to the party and it was tremendous and I was like it must be the cologne, it must be! *shrugs*
Coley: Yeah that learning stage when you're a teenager of how much to apply really can go arwy in many different ways!
Tyler: Yeah it's one of those, it feels like a recipe where it's like okay if it says 3/4 cup of flour, it's 3/4 cup of flour.
Coley: Yeah, right this isn't seasoning to taste!
Tyler: Yeah this isn't time to mess around with the 3/4 a cup, you put a cup in there and the cake takes over the whole oven so less is more.
Coley: I feel like it used to be a standard in movies and sitcoms and not so much anymore but they always write a character where their whole personality trait was the too much cologne guy. It was like the uncle, he had the slick back hair but a patch was missin' in the front like me and it was always.
Tyler: Open shirt, no t-shirt.
Coley: Oh yeah gold chain.
Tyler: *nodding* yup! Kramer.
Coley: Hitting on a married woman *laughs*
Tyler: I gotta say I was at the store today and a woman had on way too much smell good, but it smelled good so I was like ah *balancing hands back and forth*
Coley: Yeah I feel like it's never been a woman in that, men are the ones because ours are too overpowering but for a woman it's like "oh there's too many flowers in this store!"
Tyler: There's way too much Cedar Oak wood in this magazine isle! *silence* Why do you ask!? That's a bizarre question to ask Mick!
Coley: *flabbergasted* Well it was on topic I felt like!
Tyler: *bobs head* Sure.
Coley: But also because our good pals over at Hawthorne
Tyler: Ohhhhh! *smiling*
Coley: Have made smelling good easier than ever and also just better than ever! Better smells, not only because of the ingredients they use but because they truly customize it to you. You're not standing in a department store with a bunch of different smell swatches getting sprayed so many times you can't decipher the odors anymore. No no no!
Tyler: I can't do it Mick, I can't do it, I need something for me! Do you have any cologne for me?
Coley: Hawthorne doesn't just have one cologne for you, they've got 2 friend *holds up 2 fingers*!
Tyler: *taken aback literally* *leans forward eyes wide* Hmm!?!?
Coley: That's right they've got a work and they've got a play! They've got a day to day, one you can use a workin's man cologne!
Tyler: Sure.
Coley: One you can take to your place of business!
Tyler: A blue collar cologne!
Coley: Yeah, and then they've got a play. Buddy.
Tyler: A no collar cologne!
Coley: That's right, that's for when you wanna hit the town and paint it red!
Tyler: Yeeeeaaah!
Coley: Take a nice respectable young lady, or man out on the down with you!
Tyler: I want a shrimp delight fantastic!
Coley: And let them know this isn't going to be just a regular night, this is gonna be a Hawthorne night! How it works? You take a quick, and legitimately very quick 2 minute quiz, Hawthorne tells you the two colognes that are best for you. One for work, one for play. They'll ask you what kind of adult beverage you like, things like this and then them and their smell scientists will match perfectly-
Tyler: Great job! Great job!
Coley: It really is, except for when like the skunk perfume. Tony we keep telling you this isn't gonna get it done!
Tyler: Pepe Le Pew this just will not do!
Coley: No, so not only will this make a great purchase for yourself but Father's day which is looming right around the corner, this is the perfect gift for the dad or dads in your life! Your husband, son, brother, your father or even that pesky father in law! Take the quiz for him and Hawthorne will
Tyler: A pain in my neck if you know what I mean!
Coley: Hawthorne will handle the personalization from there. It's a thoughtful gift, special, unique for him. It's all totally risk free with free shipping and free returns. Check out Hawthorne at Hawthorn.co that's Hawthorne with an E pals.
Tyler: Yeeaaah.
Coley: And use our promo code TAPE to get 10% off your first purchase! That's H-A-W-T-H-O-R-N-E dot C-O use our code TAPE, T-A-P-E to get 10% off your purchase! Hawthorne.co, the perfect gift for Fathers day!
Tyler: I like that, this's a true story. Last week I used the Hawthorne conditioner in my hair and beard like 3 nights straight just cause I like the way it smells in bed. I like to get in bed, get it on my pillow and get a little scent of it.
Coley: Yeah no this isn't just for other people. Smelling good for yourself is very important!
Tyler: That's right. I want my mask to smell good in these times, these trying times.
[End Ad Read]
Coley: Yeah, uncertain times.
Tyler: Yeah... the only thing i'm certain of is that Kevin Durant is the head of a drone...nahhh
Coley: *laughs* We find out, no he "I actually invented it ground up myself"
Tyler: "That was all me, the government came in, they were the angel investors!"
Coley: Uh Bill Simmons put out another podcast apologizing for the previous podcast *cracking up*
Tyler: *laughs major chuckles* I saw that he put it out but I didn't listen. I didn't listen to the previous one, proud of myself but I did see he was like no no immediately "Here's Deray" *laughs*
Coley: *Mighty hearty laughter*
Tyler: Listen I like Deray, Deray does so much great work and has been for years. When he's on your podcast you know you fucked up. Not him but you know you fucked up.
Coley: When you can hear that vest brushin' up against the mic.
Tyler: When you can hear the zip
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: and then after that he and Deray did a 2007 redraft!
Coley: *laughs* he's like "I actually think Durant should of went 3rd!"
Tyler: Yeah Deray's like "I had Al Jefferson 4th!"
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: Like wow, Deray a big Prentiss Mississippi basketball stan
Coley: *laughs* Yeah I saw that and then he had Pop come on and yell for a while, which I guess.
Tyler: Wait like Popovich or Bill Simmons pops?
Coley: Yes yes *nodding* Popovich yes.
Tyler: I thought you meant Bill Simmons' pops.
Coley: Yeah he's like "I stand with the blue line!"
Tyler: Yeah and then he yells at Popovich about that.
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: You don't see Black and White but you coach the Spurs! Riddle me that!
Coley: *laughs* That was a good one. Yeah he said he misread the moment which that's one way to apologize!
Tyler: Mmmm...It was like the time the '83 Celtics misread the game 7 of the Eastern Conference Finals! Jojo White missed a free throw.
Coley: Yeah I don't know, it feels like a pretty easy moment to read but he owned it, in his way, so you gotta give him credit for that....I suppose.
Tyler: Listen, i'll say this, time and time again. It's nothing to fuck up, we all fuck up! Daily. But to stay and remain and keep fucking up the same exact way, that's the error! That's the mistake. Unless it's me! Because I like consistency. But everyone else!
Coley: Yeah, I consistently fuck up. That's my charm! Everyone knows that
Tyler: It's kinda my thing.
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: But once I saw that, I was like Deray? Oh them mentions must of been real bad.
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: Deray and Ryen Russillo talk about tax implications of voting for Donald Trump.
Coley: I was gonna say I saw Russillo put out a solo pod apologizing. I was like I don't think anybody's listening to this pal.
Tyler: I don't think anyone who disagreed would listen to it, the people who agreed were like "what do you have to apologize!?"
Coley: That's why I don't think they'd listen either! Cause they'd find the apology sickening!
Tyler: *laughing* right! Oh boy, there's a-, oh no I guess it's actually going on as we're recording. The TNT
Coley: Oh the "Need to have a conversation"
Tyler: Yeah "we're gonna start a dialogue" with the 4 people I'd love to hear at this time. Ernie Johnson, Charles Barkley, Officer Shaquille O'Neal and Kenny Smith!
Coley: *bursts out laughing* Sheriff Deputy Shaquille O'Neal!
Tyler: Oh man I was like "imma miss that for the laughs" and now that I look back i'm like "I'm glad I missed that"
Coley: *exhales* Charles Barkley definitely thinks you should leave businesses alone. For sure.
Tyler: Ernie gonna tell me why I should've voted for
Coley: Ross Perot.
Tyler: Mayor Pete! Shaq's gonna tell me shoot to kill. If you see anyone out on the streets after 4, after 4pm shoot to kill.
Coley: I can't wait to re-read the transcript of this conversation.
Tyler: Oh I gotta give a shoutout, BKSTUSSY, who's been doing transcriptions of like our most recent episodes. One, I hope everything's okay my guy.
Coley: *bursts out laughing* Yeah wha- *shakes head*
Tyler: *laughing* I'm just, i'm hoping it's one of those "hey i'm gettin' paid double time, hazard pay at work I got some free time to kill" I hope it's one of those. Hope everything's okay (absolutely not) but yeah if you didn't have time to listen to like 14 hours maybe you have time to read it!
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: But shoutout to BKSTUSSY.
Coley: Yeah no it's commendable.
Tyler: I do like he also puts in like the
Coley: laughs, yeah. Onomotopoea
Tyler: like laughs, man voice, making fun of Ethan Sherwood Strauss voice.
Coley: *laughing at my psychosis*
Tyler: So he's doing some good work.
Coley: Yeah it's like a, he's a week away from just drawing straight up comic books like BAM! POW!
Tyler: *a good chuckle*
Coley: KA-BLAM-O
Tyler: And then Whiskers went Zippidy Bow! *laughing*
Coley: Yeah I like how during this time we've transitioned to video and someone else is like "Nah, it's still not cuttin' it. Need the written word!"
Tyler: "I'm tellin' you guys 2020's video but 2021 is court stenography that's what the future is. Short hand!
Coley: Yeah that's the line of work he wants to go into (absolutely not, if this is what it comes to I will be homeless) so this is gonna be his resume.
Tyler: He just gets somewhere a guy's like "you transcribed 3 episodes of Mickstape? *looks on intently* Here you take my job! You sit on this side of the desk! You're the president!"
Coley: *hearty belly chuckles* Just takes off his stenographer hat and puts it on him like a train conductor.
Tyler: *mocks me typing at a rapid rate that is certainly an overestimation of my own abilities* That was like billions and billions and billions of words but bless 'em.
Coley: *laughing, I believe he may be worried for me*
Tyler: He's doin' some good work for the good cause
Coley: *skeptical for certain* Sure
Tyler: I just hope he's in a good space.
Coley: Yeah that's my worry is I can't imagine like Elon Musk isn't doin' this.
Tyler: What if BKSTUSSY is Elon Musk? *tilts head, thinking deeply*
Coley: Possible.
Tyler: I'll leave it at that. This is the one episode that don't get transcribed, that's how we figure out it's been Musk all along.
Coley: He gets to this point and he's like "Fuck these guys!"
Tyler: Yeah, "End!"
Coley: *mocks typing motion in very exaggeratory fashion* "Coley says the N word for some reason!" *laughs* *(until it happens)*
Tyler: *laughs that could wake a village* "Whiskers goes on and on about Palestine!"
Coley: *mighty laugh* yeah, "and why he picked them for his fantasy camp visit"
Tyler: *mimes Draymond holding the gun in Israel, smiling, thumbs up*
Coley: *laughs out loud*
Tyler: *cracking up*
Coley: Like Ernie Johnson's a good dude like I met him when I was doing security like he came out of his was to talk to us when it was Red Sox National game, no one and I mean no one fucking does that shit and so I know he's a good dude but boy oh boy did he mishandle that, "This is why I voted for no one!" last time around.
Tyler: This is why I microwaved my vote for 4 minutes on high and ate it with a fork and knife.
Coley: It was first down you see, I punted! I thought my defense was better!
Tyler: I threw the ball out of the arena, and here's why you should too!
Coley: I took the wind in overtime I figured 5 miles east to west, that could do anything!
Tyler: *laughing* Did you get the ball back? *shaking head* They ran the opening kickoff back, we never got the ball.
Coley: *laughing, rubbing eyes*
Tyler: It's one of those things where he means well. Kenny, I think Kenny means well, he's one of those I don't know what he could say. Like if I was doing a joke for what they each said, I don't know what he'd say, I have no idea. I have a general idea, I know what Shaq's gonna say, I know what Barkley's gonna say.
Coley: He's a literal officer of the law!
Tyler: The most officer and will not let you forget it!
Coley: No *shakes head*
Tyler: Chuck feels like a very much "I don't know why they're looting property" type guy. MAYBE i'm wrong, maybe we'll see these clips and i'm wrong. I'd love to be wrong here!
Coley: I can't imagine we are.
Tyler: *shakes head* How long's Inside the NBA? Or how long's that show been on?
Coley: Long time.
Tyler: What's it 10-15 years? We gotta good read on these guys. I'm just not looking forward to it.
Coley: Shaq really is just like real life Homer Simpson in the sense that he's had every job, he's said everything, he engages in hijinks.
Tyler: The most! Can't Stop The Rain hit shuffle today and like until there's a NBA player that holds his own on a song with a living Biggie Smalls, he's the best rapping ball player! That's the bar, that's the line, if you can cross that you're better. You can't? You're not.
Coley: Yeah I don't even know what the comparable would be for modern times.
Tyler: People were like "Dame ate him up". I was like did Dame hold his own with the Notorius B.I.G? Cause that's what the original tweet said *nods*
Coley: Right.
Tyler: I don't think he did. *shakes head*
Coley: But i'm trying to think of like what, cause Dame did a song with very past expiration date Lil Wayne like that doesn't count.
Tyler: *shakes head* no...
Coley: I'm not tryna hear Iman Shumpert go bar for bar with Kendrick you know what I mean?
Tyler: *very anti* *eyes widen* *shakes head* nooo. No I am not.
Coley: *laughing hearty belly chuckles*
Tyler: Marvin Bagley and Wale? Ehhh...I like both of those guys, i'll pass. I'll pass.
Coley: Yeah like I don't even know what the modern....like Marquise Daniels and Future on the same song? Maybe, we're gettin' warmer
Tyler: Yeah and he just holds his own, i'm like shit! *groovin' head and bobbin'*
Coley: Listen Q-Sif can rap.
Tyler: That's the thing, like even Bagley can rap and Dame still ate his lunch, it is what it is. I think one of these days we are gonna get a-
Coley: Legit?
Tyler: Yeah I think it's just inevitable. Because now it's like, I feel like before, like Chris Webber's a guy who owned a record studio not a money thing or a way to put guys on it's like he just likes making music. So I think one of these days we're gonna get a guy who's an NBA player and it's like "Okay wow that guy can really produce."...Or like "That guy can really rap!"
Coley: Oh I think the producer thing for sure, who was the college football player who was just making beats for Rick Ross?
Tyler: Ohh uh he went to Miami, I can't think of his name.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: That's what i'm saying, I think we'll get like an NBA guy, it's one of those like Emoni Bates is like "i've been the number guy since I was 12 so I worked on my game but then I also put some Fruity Loops work in so i'm just that guy."
Coley: That's where I think it has to be a more middle of the road player, I don't think it can be a superstar cause we're not tryna hear their shit. I feel like, going back to Durant, I don't think he's a terrible rapper. I just don't wanna hear him rap.
Tyler: You're more of a LeBron raps guy?
Coley: No he stinks too.
Tyler: *cracks up in laughter*
Coley: Do you remember the song they did together?
Tyler: Unfortunately I do. *nods*
Coley: Awful! *shakes head*
Tyler: It's one of those things imagine, and it came out after the fact, in 1995 y'all remember this track that Magic Johnson and Michael Jordan did together? And no one cared.
Coley: *laughing* Jordan's just like singin' the hook. He's like "I will not be participating in the uh", yeah that's the thing they might of made a Temptations type song.
Tyler: Yeah Jordan liked that R&B man, I don't know what kind music Magic liked. I have no idea.
Coley: *shaking head* I think Magic doesn't even know his car has a radio in it. He just sits in it smilin' and drivin'. *chuckles slightly*
Tyler: Yeah. "I'm Magic Johnson!" *mimes hand on wheel with a big 'ol grin*
Coley: *laughs* This is great! Just cruisin' through red lights, he's got no idea.
Tyler: "I'm havin' a blast!"
Coley: *laughing* 4 wheels, steering wheel this is-!
Tyler: "This is tremendous!"
Coley: "Stop sign!" He just calls out everything
Tyler: *cracks up* "Yield!?" *mimes slamming gas and leans back*
Coley: "I think I will!"
Tyler: *hands on wheel looking back and forth bobbing head, gigantic grin*
Coley: *laughing* "10 and 2!"
Tyler: "Yellow and red, no there it is! Just like they said it would be."
Coley: Oh yeah no he's just calling out the like "I think it's gonna turn red" when it's already on yellow. Everyone in the car's like "we know! we fuckin' know!"
Tyler: He's like "Called it!"
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: "That'll be $100 from everybody in here!"
Coley: *laughing still* He's like "I won't go until I get it"
Tyler: Yeah, "Fine!*grunt*"
Coley: I'm tryna think, like Stak, Stephen Jackson who I meant to shout out last episode so i'm glad I just thought of him now cause he's been doing tremendous work.
Tyler: Absolutely!
Coley: At the forefront of this. So shoutout Stephen Jackson, but I feel like he can rap.
Tyler: Yeah *nods* I feel like he's one of those where he can do whatever.
Coley: Yeah whatever he wants to.
Tyler: Like Stephen Jackson he's the new James Bond? Okay, i'll go see that! I'd watch that, Stephen Jackson-
Coley: 5 minutes, he's like "I caught the bad guy, he's dead"
Tyler: *cracks up* "No I whooped him real good".. Matt Barnes is the Octopussy and they end up just blowin' a whole gram together. Yeah. *laughing*
Coley: I'm tryna think what level player right now could do it.
Tyler: It's one where we find out like "Man oh man did you guys know CJ McCollum can really produce, like REALLY produce? He's a pretty good ball player but no on the Keys that guys dirty!"
Coley: I could see him blowin' a mean Sax!
Tyler: mmm *nods* Zion Williamson, noted bass player, improper benefits taker.
Coley: Yeah *starts swayin' hand to imaginary beats* Awww. *laughs*
Tyler: Listen, I didn't take the benefits!
Coley: You tried!
Tyler: Yeah I tried! But I didn't take 'em! Listen, the bank declined it, I didn't decline it.
Coley: Yeah! *laughing profusely*
Tyler: So credit to me, I never gave up on my Goosehunt to get Zion Williamson out of here.
Coley: Yeah no it was due.
Tyler: He hasn't played a game in weeks, so you tell me who won.
Coley: Bagley might need to rap, the way everything else is goin'.
Tyler: *exhales* I will say I do, really really like they put the playoff cutoff at 4 games exactly. "Like whaddya know the Pelicans are at 3 and a half! *leans back shrugs* well I guess they have to be part of the festivities. Oh they've got Zion Williamson!? We didn't even know that! Well! I guess he'll have to be part of it too!"
Coley: Would it be infuriating if Doncic just had bars at the ready?
Tyler: I wouldn't hate it! He's one like "Listen i've been pro since I was 12 but it was really no competition so I just spent a lot of time writing bars". It's like "Nah this guy is just a lyrical miracle man, he's got it all! He hates his stepdad, he loves Mountain Dew like he"
Coley: *laughing* Yeah much like Vlade Divac
Tyler: *laughs* "This guy's just got "it"'
Coley: I feel like Oladipo's the perfect level, but he sings.
Tyler: Yeah I will say, he's got the singing down. Rap? Who would it be the funniest if they were a great rapper?
Coley: Joe Harris.
Tyler: That would be very funny.
Coley: And he's got like the Rude Jude type voice too so we're like "Are we sure this is Joe Harris"
Tyler: *chainsmoker of 32 years voice* "Nah it's me, it's me Joe Harris!" *laughing*
Coley: *laughs* I feel like Van Vleet, like if he was like Nav just recording from another closet in a different room level.
Tyler: Once they said Van Vleet looks like a Puerto Rican barber that's the only thing I can ever see him as. Like it's a barber in everybody's shop who got the Puerto Rican flag on his mirror and cuts hair like Van Vleet.
Coley: *laughing* I feel like Ben Simmons would be really funny if he could like really spit.
Tyler: Simmons would be funny. *nodding* If he got a lot of bars about shooting people, long range shooting. I'm tryna think of who else, Pat Connaughton like "nah that guy, listen you don't wanna put on a beat and let Patty Mac go on it"
Coley: That's a guy who's mastered like everything else that's been put in front of him, that wouldn't surprise me.
Tyler: Listen, Notre Dame education he can put it together. We'll see.
Coley: Who would have the most believable bars? Actually, Kawhi just like noted never speaks, but you put him in a booth? That guy pours his soul on the wax!
Tyler: He's just Twista, just like 100 miles a minute.
Coley: *cracking up* or he's like incredibly vile like Too Short just extremely graphic
Tyler: Yeah "Put it in her mouth- Kawhi Leonard"
Coley: Yeah "Slob on my Knob 2- Kawhi Leonard"
Tyler: Kawhi would be a good one. Alex Caruso.
Coley: No, that would just be more infuriating than anything.
Tyler: Who's the person's raps you would most like to hear? Like if they were rapping about their life experiences, it doesn't have to be good. I just think Russell Westbrook's would be really funny. I don't know if it'd be good or not, it's just 16 songs about him loving his wife, loving his kids, loving basketball-
Coley: High fashion.
Tyler: Yeah, High fashion, fighting other peoples wives and husbands, not fucking with Kevin Durant. It's "nah this shit just bangs, 12 songs 38 minutes, that Russ shit was alright, that Why Not? EP was alright"
Coley: Yeah his would be like extremely hard pounding beats and very quick, like a very quick album.
Tyler: *nodding*
Coley: He produces, he drew the artwork himself, wrote all his own raps. A triple double.
Tyler: Russell Westbrook
Coley: I'd obviously love to hear Marcus Smart's, I can't imagine something you'd like to hear less of.
Tyler: Yeah those Flowermound bars.
Coley: I can't wait till we get him on this show and he's like "Flowermound's not nice!" and he's just showing us pictures. You're like "I've heard it before *shoo's away*
Tyler: Listen I hear flowers! How bad can it be!? *laughs*
Coley: *laughing* He's like "Flowermound really means like a friends gravesite where they put all the flowers on a mound of dirt" and you're just like "yeah yeah yeah"
Tyler: *shakes head* I'm just sayin', ain't no petunias in Compton! I'll say that Smart! We'll leave it there.
Coley: Who was it-? I was thinkin' this earlier who was the player, was it a player or a rapper? The first time they were disgusted by the fact that they had front yards.
Tyler: *cracks up* I feel like I remember, yeah it was some video they put out and they couldn't believe it.
Coley: Yeah they were like "What!?"
Tyler: Andre Miller or somethin'? Somebody on the Clippers or somethin'? *can't withhold laughter"
Coley: It was either like a college visit at UCLA or some shit. Part of me wants to say it's Kareem cause like cause someone talked about "What are these rappers complaining about!? They've got yards! I'd kill for a yard!"
Tyler: It's one of those, like my sister has a friend like born and raised in Compton and they're like "there's that side of Compton but my grandparents have a farm in Compton! So it's that side of Compton too." I think George Bush Sr. was born in Compton, like that's what typa *laughing*
Coley: *cracking up*
Tyler: Born or raised, one of the Bush's. I was like "really!?" It's a bad look for Eazy-E, I gotta say.
Coley: *laughing* I wouldn't wanna hear anything Steph had to say
Tyler: You don't wanna hear those "My wife look great, I play golf,-
Coley: No!
Tyler: -both my parents were plus athletes, my brother's also a pro"
Coley: Dion Waiters
Tyler: Waiters would have some good bars. I only wanna hear a song about that edible he took. That's all I wanna hear.
Coley: Yeah *nods* Astronaut Status Part 2
Tyler: Yeah, On The Moon. Herro, I feel like-
Coley: *laughs at the absurdity of what he just said*
Tyler: Herro's one of those I feel like listen he's spittin' I like it, but I don't like it *shakes head*
Coley: *laughing immensely* I mean Gobert I don't think anyone would even click on.
Tyler: No i'd listen, like I wanna hear every word so I can slander his ass. *disgusted* Rudy Gobert.... *shakes head*
Coley: Before we talk about the actual NBA coming back there was a white who had a take today.
Tyler: Sure.
Coley: Big take!
Tyler: *shakes head* I think I know where you're goin' and I hate that I know it. I hope i'm wrong, I hope i'm wrong!
Coley: You definitely do. I saw you speak on it! There are a couple things in this world that I enjoy, that other people make way fucking harder to enjoy because of their dog shit ass opinions, Rick and Morty's one of em, the New England Patriots are one of em, just Boston sports in general!
Tyler: Sure.
Coley: Run the Jewels are fine!
Tyler: *laughing whilst shaking head profusely* Not if you ask Whiteman56_82
Coley: It's also tough like Jensen Karp is a good person, like I know he's a good dude, he's like Adam Ferrone's good friend, he was just on KFC Radio last week, been on multiple times. I know he's got some sense about him! He used to work with Kanye back when Kanye was nobody, like he's clearly been around. So for him to run up with this dogshit take! What are you talkin' about!?
Tyler: *shakes head* What was the take Mick? For those uninformed, tell us what your BFF Jensen Karp said!
Coley: Yeah that's me! He certainly knows i'm alive. I'm going to your timeline since you are pushing the white mans narrative as per usual!
Tyler: You know me!...I even re-read it, i'm like did he put some qualifications on this that I missed?
Coley: No!
Tyler: No! *shakes head*
Coley: Yeah if his quote was "Run the Jewels is on the greatest white guy/black guy 4 album" *laughs* then it would be, yeah I gotta do some thinkin' to even come up with a counter to this.
Tyler: We got 4 albums better than that! So even that's not true!
Coley: *laughing* *holds 1 finger up* But were they consecutive?
Tyler: Fair! We'll have to go to BKSTUSSY who wrote our lyics (buddy, you're in trouble) *laughing*
Coley: *laughing* *exhales* "Just an FYI-" this was at 7:08PM, so this was even yesterday, so it lasted the night and then people saw it again this morning and then people were furious!
Tyler: He was havin' some dinner when he tweeted that shit.
Coley: "Just an FYI: Run The Jewels has the greatest 4 album run in hip hop history"
Tyler: *buries head, shaking profusely*
Coley: I like Run the Jewels, tremendous in concert! Lot of people don't show up for their concerts, don't put on a good show, aren't passionate enough. Tremendous in concert!
Tyler: I could see that, I could see them doing great shows.
Coley: They brought out Bernie Sanders at Coachella
Tyler: That seems like a very Run the Jewels thing.
Coley: Extremely Run the Jewels thing!
Tyler: The Runnest Jewels, yes!
Coley: I think Killer Mike, very strong rapper.
Tyler: Yes. *nods*
Coley: I think LP, solid rapper. Very strong producer.
Tyler: I was gonna say, fine producer.
Coley: Yeah I feel like that would be his take on himself as well.
Tyler: *nodding*
Coley: To say, they have the greatest 4 album run...even if it was 4 albums and they've made 4 albums which isn't technically true because LP completely produced Killer Mike's solo album so that wouldn't even be true. Like what? What are you talking about?
Tyler: It's just one of those, every once in a while you'll see a take like okay, ESPN put Michael Jordan number 2, Reggie Miller number 1, they want people to argue about this. They want people to, this is what they're looking for. I get it but even that *shaking head* it's just not true, I don't even hate Run the Jewels. I haven't heard all 4 albums, I wanna say I listened to the first 2, like they were fine. I wouldn't say they were bad, like I would never say Killer Mike like can't rap. That's just a lie, Killer Mike is a great rapper but to say they have the 4 best? That's just not true.
Coley: No, no. I scrolled down to look at some of the replies, someone put Shaq's 4 albums in here which i'm not gonna disagree with.
Tyler: I was gonna say I might have to go do some research, Can't Stop The Rain was hot!
Coley: The first reply is of course just someone who linked OutKast first 4 albums.
Tyler: Done and Done! Better.
Coley: That's where my mind went and I feel like that's what Killer Mike would say, like "no fuckin' dumb dumb OutKast" and LP replied to that and said "I have to agree with this person here" who said OutKast and then he said "I think we got a good one." Yeah! You got a good 4, no one's gonna disagree with that.
Tyler: 100% *shakes head* and even then I said Future has 4 different runs of 4 straight projects better than that and I swear to god I feel like at least 3 people responded directly and was like "that's not true" and had Run the Jewels shit in their avi. I was like okay listen, a very unbiased take!
Coley: Yeah!
Tyler: One guy his avi was a picture of him and Killer Mike and the background was like the Deluxe version, like the Run the Jewels, the chain, the hand. I was like *nodding* i'm sure you mean well it's also just not true! I don't know what to tell you, that's like being like "listen, Just FYI: I'm telling you right now, Kyle Lowry had the best 4 straight point guard seasons of all time.". Listen, Kyle Lowry, very good! All star, champion, gold medalist, hall of famer....That's not true! Like that's just not true! *holding arms up in disbelief* *laughing*
Coley: *hearty chuckles*
Tyler: I don't know what else to say, that's just not true. Somebody's like "You put together Run the Jewels best hits and it's not better than Purple Rain", i'm like hey points were made!
Coley: *exhales*
Tyler: So yeah it's one of those things people bringing up. Rick and Morty, i'm tryna think of a couple of those things where like I like these things but the fans-
Coley: They just take it too far! They take it a little too far.
Tyler: The fans of this thing make it much harder for me to either like this or get other people to check this out. Again, i've never said Run the Jewels is bad, because they're not bad! It'd be a lie to say they were bad. But it's also a lie to say they have the best 4 album run in history. Not when Lil Wayne has 4 Carter's like get out of here! "They weren't even consecutive so come on!"
Coley: *laughing* Someone immediately replied with the ASAP Yam$, rest in peace, tweet. "I hate white hip hop heads no offense I just don't like y'all."
Tyler: You talk about a visionary! You talk about another person that would of been doin' 150,000 retweets 750,000 likes on a tweet. Yams!
Coley: Yeah he was puttin' numbers up in the dead ball era!
Tyler: Mhhmm! Babe Ruth! Babe Yams!
Coley: Jensen replied, "A lot of response, both ways!" *shakes head* No there wasn't.
Tyler: "Lotta people tellin' me i'm a fuckin dickhead and a lot of people tellin' me to kill myself! Lotta response both ways!" *laughs*
Coley: *laughing* Most options have been OutKast, A Tribe Called Quest, Gangstarr, Gibbs, De La, Cube, Early Kanye. Who else? Genuinely surprised by the Killer Mike hate." One thing that I don't wanna say makes it more difficult to listen to them, Killer Mike on record and Killer Mike standing next to TI wearing 7 different shirts sewn into one, *shakes head* 2 different people!
Tyler: Listen, if only Killer Mike would realize that! Because again-
Coley: He's another person, I think he means well.
Tyler: He does! That's why it's much more frustrating because 1, he means well. 2, he's incredibly smart like everything he talks about, he's done the research, he's not talking out of his ass. I think he's got legit one of the best rap voices i've ever heard.
Coley: Very strong!
Tyler: Again can just rap his ass off, a guy you can put a verse on with literally anybody and he can hold his own!
Coley: Oh yeah.
Tyler: Anybody in the world, any era and he can hold his own. It's like "Yeah! The best 4 in history! Not entertaining anything else!". That's wrong! Sorry *shrugs* *laughs*
Coley: *laughing* I feel like any tweet that starts off Just FYI
Tyler: Heads up! Just so you know!
Coley: In case you guys weren't aware! Like shut the fuck up, c'mon. I've bought Run the Jewels merch, like I said i've seen them in show, in concert. A, just them and B, part of Coachella shit like that where i'm like "yeah i'm gonna make sure I go check them out cause I know what i'm gonna get there, I know it's gonna be good"...I would never say this shit, what bothers me the most is NBA writers, MLB writers and just old white sports writers, who's their favorite musician?
Tyler: Springsteen? I don't know.
Coley: Bruce Springsteen! NBA writers have turned 2 things into Bruce Springsteen, Run the Jewles and John Wick! They've turned both those fuckin' things into Bruce Springsteen and it infuriates me. It fuckin' infuriates me!
Tyler: I can't remember who said it today, it was like "hey shoutout to all the NBA writers who just found their password again today to tweet about the league comin' back and y'all ain't said shit in 5, 6, 7-"
Coley: There are couple of 'em
Tyler: Oh there's multiple of 'em that ain't said shit.
Coley: There were a couple of em
Tyler: "-and when the tournament came back y'all found your password. Hey welcome back, good to have you!"
Coley: *shakes head*
Tyler: Glad to see you guys! When it's real issues to talk about!
Coley: Yeah it's people with big ass platforms too.
Tyler: Huge, huge!
Coley: I don't know how you can be so quick to, if your whole thing is sharing videos of the NBA, of black people doing spectacular things and then when it comes time-
Tyler: *raises finger, sits up* Jokic dunked too Mick!
Coley: No he doesn't! *laughing* he simply does not.
Tyler: *laughing immensely* hasn't dunked since he was 13.
Coley: Like that's the thing too, even if your whole thing is like, NBA. If you wanna stick to this and only do NBA, you could do that and make it very known where you're at.
Tyler: Mhmm *nodding*
Coley: Like I said, Jaylen Brown, Stak, Malcolm Brogdon. Plenty of players are out, plenty of coaches were talking, the NBA did not stay silent on this. You could of stuck just to that and let it be known where you were.
Tyler: It's one of those things where your silence also let us know where you are.
Coley: For sure.
Tyler: We see you, bet.
Coley: Also, I know you're not a fan. Freddie Gibbs new album, very good.
Tyler: I do hear good things. I keep hearing good things, it's one of those like i've tried, I wouldn't say it's wack. Just not for me, it didn't catch me, but people seem to like him a lot. He also said fuck Kaepernick so *bobs head back and forth*
Coley: Yeah...He's an anti-vaxer too, I don't understand it!
Tyler: Oh boy! *laughs* He's like "listen, we didn't have shot in Gerry, Indiana so"
Coley: Fair, more than fair.
Tyler: "I birthed myself so I don't wanna hear it!" *laughs*
Coley: *cracks up*
Tyler: "I don't wanna hear this Polio stuff!"
Coley: Him and Killer Mike's big too! His whole, if I remember Killer Mike's correctly it's "I don't trust it, white people invented it"
Tyler: Listen! That's Trilly Whiskers frame of mind!
Coley: *laughing* Cause I remember when gun control was at its peak, Killer Mike was like "You're not taking mine away so I can be unarmed when the hoods roll up to my front door, no sir!" and I was like "I don't completely agree with it but I understand your frame of logic!"
Tyler: Yeah i'll also say like he's been about that. It ain't no Drew Brees, ain't no flip floppin'.
Coley: No. No..
Tyler: For Killer Mike. I remember long ago on Twitter I think I asked Killer Mike, he was like "everybody should have 5 or 6 different type of guns" and I was like "what types do you recommend" and he was like goin' back and forth with me-
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: and this was years, years ago. So he is consistently about that shit.
Coley: He's like "well I have a Beretta, a shotgun, a MAC-11,-"
Tyler: Yeah "A revolver, a MAC-11 I lent that to Uzi" *laughs*
Coley: *laughing* So yeah stop ruining the things I like by overhyping them for no reason. Theres no need, there's no need!
Tyler: Boy oh boy, listen hey, just an FYI Mick, just so you know Scooter Gennett had the best 4 year any second baseman has ever had! FYI.
Coley: 2nd Base! *Cracks up* for the Reds specifically.
Tyler: It's like "What are you talking about!? Joe Morgan's better! Bip Roberts is better!?"
Coley: Pete Rose played some second for the Reds! What are you talking about!?
Tyler: He might not be top 5 for Reds 2nd baseman. *laughing*
Coley: *still cracking up* 2 Chainz did float on that album though. He absolutely did, came in for a feature, slid and left.
Tyler: Whatever album you said, would of fit for 2 Chainz.
Coley: I do appreciate when like rappity rappers just put on someone like 2 Chainz and they hold their own and it just leaves people like "well, I didn't see that comin'!"
Tyler: Listen this is honest to god how I got Arian Foster to Young Thug.
Coley: Yeah *nodding*
Tyler: Cause it's one of those things he was like "I'd hear my other peoples stuff and it's like i'd just keep nodding my head"..i'm like "that's what i'm trying to tell you!"
Coley: *cracks up in a raucous laughter*
Tyler: It doesn't have to be okay I feel every single syllable this guy is sayin'. It's like you're missin' the forest for the trees, if you're lookin' at every single word of a verse you gon' miss the verse but if you just listen, it's like man, he's catchin' feelings like Walter Payton that's incredible! Like wow! On memory lane no less!?
Coley: *laughing profusely*
Tyler: Briefly, I brought up SremmLife3, their 3rd album. A lot of people didn't like Swae Lee's album, I had no idea, like hated it! Not only didn't like it but hated it. I just had no idea, I didn't know!
Coley: I'm pullin' it up now.
Tyler: I was listening to-, Red Wine hit shuffle, so I was talkin' about that. I was like I don't know if it's a great 3 albums on those but all the best? It's a tremendous 1 album and I got so many replies that was like "yeah if you take out that Swae Lee garbage" "Jimmi ran it up the score on Swae Lee" I was like hey come on man, i'm not gonna say he didn't win but run up the score? Come on man.
Coley: I'll say he didn't win. No problem.
Tyler: You think Swae Lee won? Or you think it was about even?
Coley: If I were to-
Tyler: Like I don't hate any take except that like somebody won handily, it's like I liked it, I wouldn't say anybody ran away with it though.
Coley: If I were to rank the 3, it'd be the 3 in which they gave 'em to us. The joint, Swae's and then Jimmi's and I don't think Jimmi's is bad. So it sounds like those people just think Swae's is outright bad.
Tyler: Yeah and I might have to go back and look, I might have to joint 1/3 but it's like again if I take my best 3 or 4 off all those like the best 13 is an incredible album! You can't hit on 27 songs, nobody hits on 27 songs.
Coley: Right *nods*
Tyler: Except future but outside him
Coley: Touchscreen Navigation, Heartbreakin' in Chino Hills,
Tyler: Heartbreakin' in Chino Hills is fire!
Coley: Heat of the Moment. I don't know if i've heard a song better than Offshore since Offshore came out! Has a lot to do with Thug!
Tyler: What one's that on?
Coley: That's on Swae's!
Tyler: Yeah I was like Offshore alone and people were like "Thug carried it", I mean if we're gonna get into that, he put him on there! Like how does he not get the credit!
Coley: And then that goes right into Guatemala which is tremendous!
Tyler: That's one of those where the single got kinda played off but a good song, it's not bad by any means!
Coley: Right! Yeah I don't understand where these people go where they're listening to singles cause other people are force feeding it down them, you know what I mean?
Tyler: Right!
Coley: Like i've never, there hasn't been a time in like the last 10 years that i've been forced to listen to songs that I didn't put on in a vehicle or anything. Like I don't understand.
Tyler: Oh yeah on the school bus! Yeah the driver played Guatemala back to back to back. I get it.
Coley: *laughing* Like I said I like Slim Jimmi's too but I think it's third.
Tyler: *exhales* Yeah, Up in My Cocina's fire, Buckets with Future.
Coley: I like Bedtime Stories a lot, I like C-L-O-S-E.
Tyler: I think the songs I like the most might be on Swae's, but I like more individual songs on Jimmi's.
Coley: That's fair.
Tyler: Like Red Wine, Offshore, Heartbreakin' in Chino Hills get constant listens. I like Brinks Truck, Chanel, Keep God First, Players Club, Cap, and then from the joint the only song I think I really don't like is Powerglide cause it's just the old 3-6 like much more, that's the only one that i'd say I actively don't like. Up in my Cocina is fire, Perplexing Pegasus, T'd up. I was just shocked by how many people were like "no they could of kept Swae's garbage off there". I was like are we talking about the same Swae Lee?
Coley: *shakes head* Yeah no, Swae Lee's someone you can also just put on literally any song and it's gonna be improved.
Tyler: Listen I agree, I thought that was the consensus until they were like "Yeah except his own album!"
Coley: *cracking up*
Tyler: I was listenin' to it and I was like man.
Coley: Do they have a better 4 album run!? If we're counting these 3 as 3 separate albums.
Tyler: Yeah and if you go on over to
Coley: Lemonade?
Tyler: Yeah SREMMLIFE, by far! I'm tryna look, what was even on? SREMMLIFE 2, oh Black Beatles yup.
Coley: Yeah Black Beatles and uh
Tyler: Look Alive, By Chance, yeah no that's better too. Then the first one was heat! No Flex Zone, Unlock the Swag, Come get her.
Coley: My ex
Tyler: Up like [redacted]
Coley: Throw some more.
Tyler: Yeah, No type!
Coley: *laughing at redacted* No type, that was the song that like I, cause No Flex Zone was just annoying to me when it first came out cause it just starts with the chorus.
Tyler: *nodding* yeah
Coley: And i'm just like who is this, whaling at me? I'll check back on you later, and then they came back with No type and it's just that Mike Will piano at the beginning. I'm like alright.
Tyler: Strongest piano, yeah.
Coley: This man simply has no type and then he immediately gives the type that he actually has.
Tyler: Yeah "I don't have no type, HOWEVER Skip Bayless."
Coley: "Since we brought it up! *laughing* Bad bitches would have to be my type if you were asking!"
Tyler: "They're really the only kind I like, let's call it what it is". Unlock the Swag, yeah.
Coley: *laughing* Yeah Unlock the Swag, I remember I walked into a Weeknd concert at Barclays and they opened for him.
Tyler: Mmm.
Coley: And I walked in and they were doing Unlock the Swag and I swear they were both like everywhere and no where at once *pointing fingers in every direction* like they were in every corner like they were just bouncing back and forth faster than any two humans should be able to move.
Tyler: *nods* yeah I saw them like I think i've talked about the free internet Future Vitamin Water show I saw, Rae Sremm opened for them like either before or right after No Flex Zone came out and it was like these fucking guys are jumping everywhere. Like we didn't even stay for their whole set, it was like they're lit but they're a little too lit! *leans back, puts hands up*
Coley: *laughing jokerishly*
Tyler: I'm not just 17 anymore I can just jump around
Coley: Take my blood pressure medication if we're gonna be doing this.
Tyler: Imma take my Milk of Magnesia and go to bed!
Coley: *laughs* My Milk Thistle
Tyler: Yeah no they're a better duo than Run the Jewels. Again not a knock for Run the Jewels.
Coley: No. People are gonna take it that way and be very upset.
Tyler: Yeah cause I was like I haven't heard anything from them in a while and I was like huh, maybe I haven't enjoyed this all the way yet! It's really once Stizz said it, "I don't need to put out stuff a lot, I really do want people to enjoy what I put out. I don't need to put out somethin' every 6 months, or even every year! Like i'll put it out when i'm feelin' it, when I got good music to put out i'll put it out" and like SR3MM was 2018, SREMMLIFE 2 was 2016 and the first one was 2015 so I feel like they're about due. They're goin' back 2 years, me personally? I wouldn't hate a little 13 song 46 minutes from Rae Sremm? God I'd hate to listen to it! In these uncertain times Mick? No way!
Coley: So that Stizz way of thinking only works if that's how the artist goes into making it too, because there is some, I hate to use the word disposable but there is some "here's some for now and I don't really care i'll have something new in 6 months that you can ride with" So like with Stizz that does work, I can go back and play 500 Horses, today and it still rides.
Tyler: Stinks!
Coley: *laughs* Yeah. Have to promptly delete it, how did this make it through the cracks?
Tyler: 500 Horses? That's not even reasonable! That's so many horses!
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: Gain Green, what does that even mean!?
Coley: Yeah there are certain people like yeah you put this out, i'll listen to it for a week or two and then something else will come out and i'll probably forget this even came out.
Tyler: It's one of those, in this time more than ever, like you said, we're at a point where if you don't want to hear a song you don't pretty much ever have to hear it again
Coley: Mhmm
Tyler: So it's like okay i'll put this out, if 4 people like this a lot, those 4 will keep listenin' to it and if not nobody else will ever here it again. So in this era more than anything I get just like, "we made 25 songs, give 'em 25 cause people will keep the 13 they like"...I know I will, and i'll just never hear the 12 ever again.
Coley: I feel like this year too i've seen a lot more people taking Deluxe albums with a different approach and it's Lil Baby and Uzi specifically. Where it's like we're not just gonna tack on 3 loosies you've probably heard already towards the end. It's like no, here's another 9 songs. *laughing*
Tyler: Yeah *nods* I will say this, I like DaBaby and I didn't even know he had a new album out till a couple weeks after the fact like and I haven't listened to it, I haven't anything good or bad.
Coley: I've heard good.
Tyler: It was just one of things, it came out after the video of him punching the fan. The female fan. So I haven't heard it, but no one said it was wack but I haven't heard it was great. I haven't heard anything! Which is probably the worst thing you can say about an album.
Coley: Yeah, i listen to both Uzi's pretty consistently.
Tyler: Yeah both Uzi's were very good. *nodding* Future usually doubles up pretty well, it's a couple like it's a few people that can do it. I think like I get why they do it, I think consistently like the Migos just go too many songs on a project. I get why they do it but like 26 tracks on a 2 CD tape, I mean come on!
Coley: I've actually heard good things about Yachty's that just came out. I haven't heard it but i've heard good things.
Tyler: I knew it was coming out, I haven't listened to it but I may give it a spin! Yachty's solid.
Coley: Yeah his first two I enjoyed a lot, and then I haven't head anything since. Then this came out and like I said i've heard only good things which I didn't anticipate!
Tyler: I gotta say *laughs* I haven't listened to Yachty since he was in the airport line ahead of me! I can't listen to nobody in the same line as me! C'mon and then they detained 'em, he was pissed! Rightfully so.
Coley: *laughing mightily*
Tyler: *shaking head* You can just see it in his face like "listen if I was gonna blow this shit up people wouldn't know who I am. Not saying i'm a super duper star but come on".."It was the guy with the red dreads! and the beads!" Like yeah, we know who he his!
Coley: That's the thing, I feel like especially with the teens like he was huge!
Tyler: Oh yeah *nodding*
Coley: Not to say he's not still but like when he first blew up everyone was like "oh shit"
Tyler: Yeah that was like when I saw him first open up for the Migos and I was like "Oh wow" cause he's positivity in a way, not like a Chance way.
Coley: Yeah, he's not wack.
Tyler: Yeah *nods* It's good! *nods profusely* Instead of Chance.
Coley: *cracking up*
Tyler: Yeah Chance is "God got me through this, he'll get you through this", I was like alright. But Yachty's shit was like "I got through it just not easy, but I got through it so I think you can too!" and it's like *nodding along* okay! Nemo sample, some good features. I'm in. Quavo gives you the okay? I'm in
Coley: Yeah I was gonna say Chance doesn't have fuckin' Minnesota under his belt.
Tyler: *shakes head* there's a old song I like with old Chance and Sir Michael Rocks from-
Coley: Cool kids
Tyler: Cool Kids, and they're just rappin' about doin' drugs and I was like this is the Chance that I enjoy!
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: Drugs and bitches Chance. I'm good off Mr. Positivity, don't say I took a major deal *waving hand* as I do a commercial with Sprite and Target.
Coley: And Apple gets my music first for some reason.
Tyler: But however! *holds 1 finger* I'm independent as they come! Man made! Talk about drugs man, I like that shit.
Coley: This actually crosses my mind every time it gets hot for the first time up here every year, I don't think there's anything I tie to the beginning of the summer like the Cool Kids first two projects.
Tyler: Time's flyin' man.
Coley: Bake Sale and Gone Fishin' back to back
Tyler: Which was, Bake Sale was first?
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: Which one was Pennies on?
Coley: That was on, that might of been on after. No Pennies was on Gone Fishin'. I was thinkin' of Penny Hardaway which was on the album after that.
Tyler: They didn't break up did they? Or are they just like chillin'?
Coley: I think both? Yeah cause they came out with somethin' in 2017 that wasn't quite it.
Tyler: Mmm.
Coley: I don't know if they can replicate what happened, cause this was '08 like this was 12 years ago.
Tyler: Yeah that's shit. Yeah, Bringin' 88 Back, Black Mags, Jinglin' *nods*
Coley: Holdin' A Pager
Tyler: Like i'm lookin', I didn't even know they had one from last month.
Coley: *laughs* me neither
Tyler: Like 13 songs, 40 minutes like I may give it a spin now but I just had no idea.
Coley: Oh yeah they got some, I see a lot of Alchemist on here!
Tyler: Yeah Cool Kids had a run, Mikey Rocks got some solo projects i'm so happy he finally put on Apple Music that I love. Like I still listen to Lap of Lux which is 2012 and Lap of Lux 1.5 which is also 2012.
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: Banko 2014 I still run, but I wouldn't go as far as to say the Cool Kids made a lot of good music. You'll never hear those words out of my mouth.
Coley: I'm surprised Chuck Inglish didn't get into, like I'm surprised he's not a super producer.
Tyler: *nods* Yeah! I thought that was honestly like okay, Rocks is goin' into more rappin', Inglish will produce and randomly pop up with the guest verse.
Coley: And smoke everyone
Tyler: Yeah, just smoke everybody. Yeah pretty much the Tyler the Creator
Coley: Yeah!
Tyler: I was going to listen to not even the album but I heard Tyler the Creator had a great verse on the Gibbs album, I was like I might listen to that!
Coley: Sure did.
Tyler: Cause Tyler the Creator just rips shit, he only rips shit he's on. That's just what he does now.
Coley: I'd argue he always has.
Tyler: It was tough pickin's for me back in 2014, 15 when i'm tryna tell people Earl is the best 16 year old rapper ever, only Tyler the Creator is smoking him on everything! *laughing*
Coley: *bursts out in the mightiest, the heartiest of chuckles*
Tyler: Like "no no, this Jordan guy, he's that deal i'm telling you" and it's like "Isiah Thomas keeps whoopin' his ass though.". "I get it! But i'm right, you're not hearin' me!"
Coley: Yeah but then Isiah Thomas just wins another 40, he's who Robbie Fox thought he was, just still in the league dominating 30 years later.
Tyler: *cracks up at Bob's lack of basketball knowledge* His 42nd All Star game!
Coley: Yeah *laughing* I just added that Cool Kids, cause I had no idea that came out
Tyler: What was it, like May 25th? Like last week!?
Coley: Yeah very, boy you talk about timing. Usually we do this and someone dies cause we talk about them, so i'm glad, i'm glad. Chuck Inglish like when Drake was first coming on, one of the reasons I was like "oh I like this guy" was because he said Coolest Kid out word to Chuck Inglish. Like "Ohhh!".. That's who Chuck Inglish was, he was a Drake reference point when Drake was tryna put himself on.
Tyler: Inglish with an I, Mm.
Coley: Yes! And I feel like they also, I know they also brought in the snapback, like they brought in that second wave of throwback jersey's, snapbacks, like they were cool.
Tyler: They're cool kids, yeah.
Coley: Yeah, they're boastful too! They'll tell you about it.
Tyler: Yeah no they had, I think Pennies was the first one I think I went back to Bake Sale after that cause someone was like "I think you'd like this" and then I head the Pennies remix with like Bun and Ludacris first
Coley: Ludacris
Tyler: Then I went back.
Coley: You talk about a remix!
Tyler: I was like no, this is exactly my type of shit talk! *Nods*
Coley: They fuckin' smoked that!
Tyler: Every single one of 'em. He was calm, tellin' people he didn't like Derrick Rose *throws hands up*
Coley: *laughing* No sweat!
Tyler: Hung his coat up in the coat check! The Pinewood boatdeck! Are you kidding me! Wow! Wow! It shine when the sun come, nah.
Coley: *laughing amusingly*
*both drink a liquid simultaneously*
Tyler: It was one of those things where i'd just keep listening to Lap of Lux and i'm like he's spittin', why isn't this triple platinum?
Coley: Yeah, is anyone else hearing this?
Tyler: He's spittin' but it's not like over spittin', he ain't rappity rappin'. The beats are good, it's chill, like good time music but he also kinda spittin'. It's like is Sir Michael Rocks the best rapper in the world? My Column:
Coley: It's not a perfect comparison but I wonder if, like if Wiz Khalifa just didn't exist and people were lookin' for like a cool, laid back-, or even Curren$y, if one of them, one of them didn't exist would that lane of been easier to attain for one of them? Cause I know they did festivals and shit so I know they were around with all the others, were people just like "they're too cool, we can't ask them to work with us" like why aren't they much bigger?
Tyler: *laughing* I think it's that, I would say they had pretty good projects but like do they have a "How Fly?", I think that's the thing cause "How Fly?" it's one of those "How Fly?" still gets spins man and will forever get spins. I think you just need that one. Gone Fishin' was good, Bake Sale was good, but if you don't have that breakthrough, that break-in, everybody was listenin' to this, in that time, Jeff Van Gundy. I just don't know if you broke through like that.
Coley: I'm tryna think of what else came out in 2008 that would of stopped them. I feel like that was when blog rap was at its apex
Tyler: Lot of the technique
Coley: I know it was a lot of Wayne, so like it was hard for anyone to get any shine when he was dropping a new *air quotes* leaked tape every week.
Tyler: I just typed in 2008 rap music and the first song that came up was "A Milli"
Coley: *cocky laugh* Alright
Tyler: Second song "Bust it Baby, Part 2" Plies, "Swagger like Us", "Put On", "My President", "Got Money", "Live Ya Life". Lotta T.I, that's another thing T.I he's gonna be like, Bomani explains it a lot, you can't really explain to people who weren't there how dope Shawn Kemp was.
Coley: Right.
Tyler: Like they'll go back and look at the numbers and they'll be like "okay they were good numbers, *shrugging* he dunked, whatever" but it's like you don't get it. He was the only one dunkin' on people like that. I think that's gonna be T.I, cause the more dumb shit he says it's like "Listen, i'm tellin' you this guy made incredible music! For multiple years!"..."Yeah alright buddy, the big words, lotta shirts guy *rolls eyes* Okay!"
Coley: *dying of laughter*
Tyler: I'm telling you, his first 3 or 4, like undefeated! They're like "alright *rolls eyes*"
Coley: Yeah that's like, Shawn Kemp didn't do anything to besmirch his own legacy like that.
Tyler: Everyone Nose by N.E.R.D, banger. Kiss me through the Phone! *leans back* My close personal friend, Soulja Boy.
Coley: I'm looking at just the albums that came out, it was The Carter 3, so between that and the leaks like 40 different Wayne songs.
Tyler: 2 week stretch.
Coley: Yeah, Paper Trail, the Nas album that he didn't get to name what he wanted to name so it's just Untitled.
Tyler: Sure! *laughing*
Coley: *laughs slightly* LAX back when people listened to The Game myself include. The recession, Trilla, so Rick Ross was like very prime Rick Ross.
Tyler: Yeahh.
Coley: Trina who has said nothing since, pro or con.
Tyler: Haven't heard Trina's name since Baddest Bitch wow!
Coley: *laughing* This is when Kanye dropped 808's which history has remembered more fondly than real time did. I know you're a fan but
Tyler: That was one, listen i've shed blood over 808's and Heartbreak. There's no doubt about it, i've did my time, i've paid my debt to society.
Coley: Theater of the mind which I know I was a big fan of when it dropped. Haven't listened to since.
Tyler: I think that's my main gripe with Ludacris' music, it all sounds good at the time. All of it and then later on, not as much *shaking head*
Coley: Who's that now?
Tyler: Drake! To me personally, everything Drake at the time sounds great but I don't listen to Nothing Was The Same or hardly none of that anymore but it all sound good at the time *shrugs with one shoulder*
Coley: David Banner dropped The Greatest Story Ever Told and while I can't speak for that whole album he had 3 or 4 singles off here that were everywhere.
Tyler: Oh no, Banner had a good run. Was that wa- uh whis- uh shit. *thinking* What's that run girl i'm tryna get your pussy wet song?
Coley: Was that Wait? Lets see.
Tyler: I'm on the 2008 Hip Hop in Music Wikipedia article and for May there's just an entry that says "Nas cosigns Jay Electronica" that's the whole entry.
Coley: *laughs*
Tyler: Polo Da Don is named songwriter of the year, you talk about somebody who had an '08 for the ages!
Coley: This is "Get Like Me" "Shawty Say"...Was "Hold on" that song?
Tyler: *thinking* no. What was the name of it
Coley: *whispering* don't play with me ahh. *not whispering* I can't even remember, I know what song you're talking about, I remember the music video. I remember it clear as day.
Tyler: Chaps came on Big If True like that was his win song.
Coley: *literally laughs out loudly* It might of been the next album.
Tyler: "Play" yeah, play's the name of it.
Coley: Play, okay it's on the next album then.
Tyler: Yeah, Certified.
Coley: Uhh tryna think, Jim Jones dropped an album. Nelly dropped an album, that's news to me.
Tyler: Which album was '08 for Nelly?
Coley: It was "Brass Knuckles"
Tyler: *shakes head* Mm.
Coley: Which uh
Tyler: Yeah that wasn't
Coley: Tryna see if I know any of these
Tyler: Going back to that white man rap opinions, like "y'all was really listenin' to Nelly?"...*eyes widen* *nodding* Yes! Yes we were.
Coley: Not this album!
Tyler: Nah *shakes head*
Coley: I'm just bein' honest, this is the one with that Akon song that he played during the battle for reasons unknown.
Tyler: *shakes head* mm.
Coley: Let's see, yeah Seeing Sounds, We Global, this was huge, big time DJ Khaled era.
Tyler: *shakes head* for shame.
Coley: Ace Hood
Tyler: *nods* Ace Hood had a nice run
Coley: He did! I feel like he was the one who ended it, he was like "I'm done, i've proved my point"
Tyler: *mumbling* *theres something on his light* *stands up to kill it* *BOW!, PAM! WHAP!*
Coley: Huh?
Tyler: No, Ace Hood had a run.
Coley: Then he had that fake jewelry, that's always tough. Here we go, I think this is We Takin' Over, is this that era? Oh this is Go Hard, Out Here Grindin'...Khaled loves throwin' Nas on all of his albums for reasons i'll never understand.
Tyler: "I gotta group banger and I know just what would set it off-
Coley: *mighty chuckle*
Tyler: Nas!"
Coley: Nasty Nas!
Tyler: Man i'm lookin' at Polo Da Don's production credits, what a run!
Coley: When was that Rich Boy album? Was that 2007?
Tyler: Rich Boy was, yup '07!
Coley: *exhales*
Tyler: Oh man, the first time I heard the "Throw Some D's" instrumental like all of it? I was like oh my god, this is a masterpiece! Pimpin' All Over The World Luda was '04, Promise Sierra '06, DJ Play a Love Song, Runaway Love, Glamorous Fergie and Ludacris
Coley: Okay.
Tyler: Crying Out for Me Mario was '07, Boy Looka Here was '07, Throw Some D's was '07, Get Bucked by Young Buck was '07, Turnin' Me On '08 *whistles*
Coley: Hero which is probably the last like really really good commercial Nas song. Love In This Club!?
Tyler: Which song?
Coley: Love In This Club.
Tyler: *nods* Oh yea. Drop it low, yeah there was, he had hits!
Coley: I'd also like to point out, cause I just heard it for the first time ever. That's, apparently we both had bad smoke detectors. I fixed mine, Tyler has not.
Tyler: Yeah, i'm thinkin' about it like literally right now just going up and ripping this shit from the wall.
Coley: *laughs in amusement mightly*
Tyler: I swear I hate that shit more than anything else. Rather burn to death than hear this shit like
Coley: 1 more time?
Tyler: Heard it 1 too many times.
Coley: Anaconda from Nicki Minaj, that's fuckin' huge
Tyler: *fire detector beeps* Yeah no I gotta. *arises in blaze of glory*
Coley: *erupts in laughter*
Tyler: Try and stall for a minute. *furiously assaulting fire detector*
Coley: *laughing mightly* I'm just gonna go through Polo Da Don songs! He started in'04, "Pimpin' All Over The World" was a very strong start. His first number one, Party Starter by Will Smith!? What happened there! London Bridge by Fergie was his first number 1, Glamorous by Fergie his second number 1. He has Fergie a lot! That's surprising. I'm actually going back to this Rich Boy album, cause this Rich Boy album, quiet as it's kept in the words of Max Kellerman. I don't know any albums that-, *sidetracked* Featuring Mark Twain!?! He just came, dropped this album and that was it! I know he's dropped more since, didn't have to! Cause this album *exhales*, they don't make many albums better than this.
Tyler: (Let's check in on Mr. Withers behind the scene, shall we?)
Coley: I'll say it! This Rich Boy album's that good and if you haven't listened to this whole album? Shame on you! Yes you. Let's Get This Paper is some of the most impassioned rapping i've ever heard. In my entire life. It says here it's a 9 minute song, there's a lot of talkin' on there, whole lotta talkin' but boy oh boy is it powerful talkin'. The Throw Some D's remix, this and the Walk It Out remix came out, in my mind, so close together that they were almost like one long song but the more time goes, nothin' wrong with the Walk It Out remix. The Throw Some D's remix? I don't know if we've had a better remix since! I really don't, I really don't! That's how incredible this god damn song is. Andre 3000, he's on both, which is probably why they're so intertwined in my mind, but if you have a remix and Andre 3000's there? I don't know why you'd even call anyone else, cause he's going to dominate that. He did a Deuces remix, he did the Walk It Out remix, then the Throw Some D's remix, boy oh boy. There are a lot of people who have tried to play the whole respectability, make your T-Shirt smaller, pull your pants up, and they sound like assholes, cause they are assholes...Andre 3000 make your mother proud, just wear it a little tighter that's all i'm askin, if you're 5'8 you don't need a 5XL. You just don't! I promise you, you don't! And people fuckin' slimmed it the fuck down. We all looked down at our shoes, said "Sorry Andre" and we got our shit together! That's how that happened, it wasn't Kanye wearing Polo shirts, it was Andre 3000 talking down to us in a politeful respectable way. It's fuckin' Andre 3000, he gets to talkin', you get to listenin'! Ain't that right Tyler?
Tyler: *appears in a cloud of dust, covered in white plastic* Absolutely! Absolutely!
Coley: I was sayin' this Rich Boy album is just one of the better albums, period.
Tyler: It was like legit a debut album and it was like "I can't believe that debut album was that good!" like how'd this guy just come on the scene with beats like that, with bangers like that.
Coley: And I was sayin' Lets Get This Paper is one of the more powerful songs i've ever heard.
Tyler: It was one of those, people were still on Throw Some D's and then Boy Looka Here came out. I was like shit, this guy's here for the long haul....Well...
Coley: Not so much!
Tyler: He made a splash when he dropped. I hope Rich Boy's doin' well right now.
Coley: He had a #1 album, it reached #3 on like the overall. #1 rap.
Tyler: Good times.
Coley: I also said I don't know if there's been a better remix since the Throw Some D's remix dropped.
Tyler: *exhales* I feel like it's either that or Walk It Out!
Coley: That's what I said! *laughs* Those were the two.
Tyler: Yeah. One blood
Coley: That one's still bein' recorded.
Tyler: *laughs* Remix's-
Coley: One Blood's just like they-, I'm sure if you cobbled together the best 7 verses it could go toe to toe. It's just they threw everyone at it.
Tyler: Y'all wanna 18 minute remix? Here ya go!
Coley: The last time anyone was excited to hear Ja Rule.
Tyler: *buries head* Another good one, Deuces. Deuces was a good remix.
Coley: I brought that up as well!
Tyler: That's the thing, I feel like its so few really good remix's. It's not hard to bring em all up, as I say that I know we're forgetting a very obvious one.
Coley: Probably. The Pennies one we brought up earlier, I would put on there. I'm sure you're the only other person who would.
Tyler: Welcome to Atlanta was a solid remix.
Coley: Yeah but that was what like 2000?
Tyler: Dude that was like 1858. General Sherman!
Coley: *cracks up* I think the Throw Some D's remix, i'm now wondering why Nelly didn't play this during his battle.
Tyler: Cause he was drunk, that's why. That's really all.
Coley: Is that it? Is that all it was?
Tyler: *nods* Yup! Just drunk!
Coley: If he would of just played that all 20 rounds, he would of won.
Tyler: I was gonna say, Luda ain't have an answer for it.
Coley: No.
Tyler: Dude Smoke Detectors really piss me off.
Coley: *shaking head profusely* They're not great.
Tyler: You unplug 'em and they still beep!
Coley: Yeah I get why they do that but not a fan.
Tyler: *shakes head* Like I put them shits in my dryer man. I gotta get some sleep tonight where else can I put this thing *shrugs laughing*.
Coley:*heavy heavy mighty laughs*
Tyler: Just gonna keep beeping? I get it. I wish it was like okay, I acknowledge that I need to change the battery? But give me 12 hours, like let me get a good night of sleep, i'll get to it in the morning I promise!
Coley: Yeah and if not you can get back to beepin'. Fair is fair.
Tyler: 100%, but nah that shit's in my dryer right now so god forbid tonight's the night some incense or somebody go off below me. I'm just sleepin' like a baby! *laughing*
Coley: *cracking up* Went out how he loved.
Tyler: Yeah *laughing*
Coley: But yeah we listed 4 remixes since this came out and 3 of them have Andre 3000 on them.
Tyler: *shakes head* It's one of those people say greats like one of the greats...like listen just give me one solo album, just one album. It doesn't even need to be a classic, just tell me because it's like you got a great verse for sure, but if you only have one verse to put on *shrugs with one shoulder* it's different when you gotta do 2 verses, 3 verses and a hook for 10 songs 12 songs whatever, and I think he could do it, like not saying that he can't do it but he's like "no once a year I think i'll just drop the verse i've been working on for the past 11 months and i'll tailor it to Walk It Out or i'll tailor it to Frank Ocean, like whatever it needs to be and it'll be fire!"
Coley: Just what an asshole!
Tyler: He's a real dick come to think of it!
Coley: But I was saying while you were gone, i'm realizing while you were gone was the perfect time to read Ad number 2...I didn't! But on the Walk it Out remix when he, there are so many dickheads who tried to get people to wear less baggy clothes and they said it in such asshole-ish ways and he didn't and I feel like everyone heard that voice and they were like "we have gotten a little ridiculous!"
Tyler: Maybe we have Andre
Coley: The way he's like "you're takin' pictures with your motha like this, take it down 1 or 2 X's there with your 5'9 frame."
Tyler: My mother was like "*throws arms up to sky* Thank you! Thank you!"
Coley: Bill Cosby was like "Pull up your pants", we're like "Fuck you old man"...Andre 3000 was like "fellas..", we're like "Yes sir"
Tyler: Absolutely Mr. Benjamin!
Coley: Cause I feel like a lot of people and it's probably because he started this campaign himself, tried to give that credit to Kanye of like the Polo shirts and fitted jeans and shit. I think it was this Andre 3000 verse.
Tyler: When was uh-, what year was that? '07-8?
Coley: Uh this was '07 yeah.
Tyler: When was Change Clothes and Go? That's when Jay-Z was really tryna beat us over the head.
Coley: *cracks up laughing* I think that was like '05 wasn't it
Tyler: That was a while ago and that's the thing Jay-Z like he tried to start all these trends and nobody listened.
Coley: It was '03!
Tyler: Yeah I was gonna say, I was in high school. I remember that, yeah. He dropped that like "No put on a shirt and a button up", i'm like no i'd rather wear this Tim Duncan Wake Forest jersey.
Coley: Yeah, backwards!
Tyler: He was like "nah we off autotune" and Wayne was like "*holds up 1 finger* We're just getting started with autotune!", the old man, he has no say.
Coley:*laughing* no he sure doesn't. "We're buyin' tenement buildings in Brooklyn!", it's like "No we're not!"
Tyler: *shaking head* Nope! "We're on rare art right now"...Not so much!
Coley: I promise you that's not what we're on! *laughing shaking head*
Tyler: *shaking head* *cracking up* No no.
Coley: Yeah that was an early Game diss too, he was like "We don't drive Maybachs, wear button up shirts" *laughing*
Tyler: Jay's the original respectability shamer.
[Ad Read 2]
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Tyler: Plen-ty!
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Tyler: I will!
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Tyler: I'm listening
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Tyler: So I can order from a Cheescake Factory in Australia?
Coley: That's what i'm hearin'.
Tyler: And they'll, I like the sound of that.
Coley: And i'll tell you what, we're never gonna be able to go back to a world without contactless delivery.
Tyler: Yeah *shaking head*
Coley: That's just a fact.
Tyler: You should have to opt in, "do you want contactful delivery?" and i'll never opt in!
Coley:*mimes button click* No!
Tyler: Mark my words! I will never opt in.
Coley: No, they way they do it, they shoot you a nice little text like "your food's here", it's like oh I know, i've been tracking you since you said you left the restaurant.
Tyler: Like no listen, it said Jim was makin' my pizza *eyes widen*, Jim better show up with this shit.
Coley: Many of your favorite local restaurants are still open for delivery just open the DoorDash app, select your favorite local restaurant, and your food will be left at your door. DoorDash deliveries are now contactless to keep communities we operate in safe. Right now, our listeners can get 5 dollars off their first order of 15 dollars or more and zero delivery fees for their first month when you download the DoorDash app and enter code MICKS. That's 5 dollars off your first order and zero delivery fees for a month when you download the DoorDash app in the App Store and enter code M-I-C-K-S. Don't forget that's code MICKS for 5 dollars off your first order, with DoorDash.
[End Ad Read 2]
Coley: Why, and we'll end with this, do the Portland Trailblazers not wanna play in the playoffs? *laughter*
Tyler: Hey man I kinda get it. They gotta play a how many game playoff, just to make the playoffs?
Coley:*shrugs*
Tyler: What's it a 7 or 8 game playoff and then you get the Lakers in the first round? Thanks a lot! I get it.
Coley: Listen the Suns want it! I don't know why the Trailblazers don't!
Tyler: I gotta say when that first came out, my immediate bet was Sarver, immediate bet. A lot of people went Dolan, I was like I get it but my bet was Sarver or Fertitta. Tillman's like "look, I can't afford to make the playoffs guys!"
Coley: *bursts out into laughter* "The air fare to Orlando is going to crush me.
Tyler: "We don't get the home gate revenue, I have to pay Harden and 11 other players? Guys I just ain't got it!" but no Portland kinda was surprising.
Coley: But when your guy is Dame, who always thinks he can win every challenge and always wants to compete, I feel like that's a big punch in the dick to a guy who's been like "No i'm here forever, i'm here for the long haul" and it's like "oh my team doesn't even wanna compete?"
Tyler: Listen, they got him to sign on the dotted line so it's one of those "We got you signed till 2028 my guy even if we trade you, we got the power. Once you signed it, you lost your vote". Like I don't even know who owns them, I know it was Paul Allen but I don't know who owns them or the Seahawks now. I don't know if it's like his family like I just don't know. So like I don't even know who voted there, it might of just been Zach Collins! Like the email just came to Zach Collins.
Coley: *busts out laughing, mimes pressing button"
Tyler: "Like no, i'm still hurt. I don't really feel like playin', we vote no"
Coley: *laughing* Yeah Nurkic just he has no idea
Tyler: He's like "give me 3 more weeks, nuh uh *shaking head*"
Coley: But yeah! We have 22 teams set to kick off late July, pretty much the end of July!
Tyler: Mhmm. Let's see it is, god forbid they put all the dates where I need them.
Coley: Someone did.
Tyler: Yeah that's what i'm saying, it's just not in the article with all the rest of the information. God forbid. Yeah, July 31 through October 12th season window which just sounds very funny. Like we'll get used to it, dates don't mean anything, time doesn't exist but just hearing "no, we'll have this thing wrapped up by Halloween!". It's like "what, no! That's when the new season starts!"
Coley: They're like "oh we agree"
Tyler: Draft Lottery's August 25th, Draft October 15th and the 2020-2021 Season likely beginning December 1st. Free Agency October 18th, Training Camps November 10th. So as of right now we are, 7 weeks away.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: 7 weeks away from NBA ball. Again I just think it's very funny they shoehorned Zion in. It was the right move, 100% but it's still just very funny that they're 3 1/2 games back and they're like "the cutoff's 4, don't ask. Arbitrary number! We picked a number out of a hat! Don't really harp on it"
Coley: We're gonna get like 3 games into this and be like "Phoenix Suns are eliminated" like you know? *laughing*
Tyler: Yeah *laughs* like ideally but even then, the thing I haven't seen and maybe I just need to read into it more but how are they going to address home court advantage? Like again, there's no home court but I still do feel like you should have some kind of advantage. I just don't know what it is now.
Coley: I read a headline, so it could be bullshit, it could've just been a joke but I read a headline that the Celtics parquet might be getting shipped down there so it might be your literal home court.
Tyler: *shakes head slightly* sure.
Coley: I don't know what that would do.
Tyler: Oh yeah, somebody like "oh shit, that's the Celtics, it's 88 outside!"
Coley:*cracking up with hearty chuckles*
Tyler: "This is definitely the Garden!"
Coley: "I just rode the Matterhorn 3 times in a row and time to pretend it's Boston!"
Tyler: I was listening to Zach Lowe and Pelton and it was like "Teams have legitimately suggested star players from home advantage teams get 7 fouls and they get the ball at the beginning of every single quarter-
Coley:*laughs loudly*
Tyler: -to get home court advantage" and it's like hey listen people are throwing stuff against the wall, I get it cause if you're the Bucks, you busted your ass all regular season for home court and now it's like no everybody's in. I feel like you have to give them something, it's dishonest to not give them some kind of advantage. I just don't know what it is. I just have no idea *shaking head*
Coley:*thinking* If you're the road team, they make you sleep in twin beds or something, like I don't
Tyler: The other team gets to do a wakeup call every hour...So I don't know what it is. Like okay, how is this gonna affect Philly? Is Philly gonna be like "okay this is still the road, we still stink"
Coley: Yeah they might just go 0-4 cause it's only road games.
Tyler: But it's also listen, we played on the same court twice. This is home now. 4-0! I have no idea how that works. I think the Bucks, Lakers anybody that earned home court over what 60 games before we shut down? 60 65 games and now it's like *shrugs* no you get to wear your white uniforms. That's the home court advantage, the other team wears their away grays.
Coley: I think the home court advantage is gonna be like having better players on your team. I think that's gonna be *laughs*
Tyler: *shakes head* Listen it wasn't enough last year..
Coley: No, no when all your players like die, it's tough.
Tyler: It is unfortunate...So I don't know, a couple teams like the Grizzlies, everything i've heard the Grizzlies have like the worse remaining record (read: schedule), they were probably gonna lost out to Pelicans or Blazers or whoever and now they don't have to play some of those harder teams. Now its everybody doesn't have to play the softer teams, everybody in this playing is gonna be-
Coley: I mean they cut 8 teams it's not like they cut like 20 teams, it's mostly, most of the NBA is here.
Tyler: For sure but it's like the 8 teams that stink, stink.
Coley: Right, yeah.
Tyler: So it's one of those like okay we don't have to play Knicks, Hawks, Cavs? That was 3 easy wins. So now it's like okay our 3 easy-ish games are like Spurs, Blazers, Nets. Like man oh man, I really liked when we got to play the Pistons 4 times, can we go back to playing the Pistons 4 times? So I don't know *shakes head* I don't know what they're gonna do with draft lottery stuff like if you win the tournament as the 8 seed do you still get that seeding? If you lose it out, are you in the lottery now?
Coley: I'd hope so.
Tyler: But it's like, Boston has Memphis' pick right or with certain protections on it.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: So it's like okay, if Memphis makes the playoffs that's gonna be the 15th pick or whatever. If they get bounced out the tournament, does that go into the Lottery cause if so it's probably the 14th pick but with the Lottery reform it might jump to the 5th pick. You just don't know. There's a chance that wasn't there before so how do you decide who's lottery? Maybe that was Portland's disagreeement like "listen we're not gonna win the tournament we'd rather have the 10% chance that we jump to a top 4 pick and rest Zach Collins and Nurkic and all these guys" So I don't know how that'll work, I don't know.
Coley: I'm more interested in the top of it where that bracket of doom where it was just the top 16 and we specifically were fucked with our half of the bracket.
Tyler: Oh yes!
Coley: There's gonna be a little movement now! One would assume!
Tyler: *nodding* sure. Lakers 1st round!
Coley: Cause once there is a playoffs it's gonna be traditional East West right?
Tyler: As far as I know, I don't think they're doin' the 1-16 this year. I don't think.
Coley: Well that, i'm thrilled about.
Tyler: I could see, I could see you, the Bucks, everybody but the Lakers being thrilled by this.
Coley: *laughing* Yeah and the way, cause I saw the betting odds to win it all and we had the 4th best odds. There's no way that'd be true under just the 1-16 seeding.
Tyler: Yeah. *nodding*
Coley: So yeah, i'm okay with that half of it. But there is some room, especially since these teams theoretically will just be playing each other, for a lot of sliding.
Tyler: Oh yeah, it's also very, the thing I found the funniest, in the 8 game regular season each team is expected to play one back to back. Why!?! *flabbergasted*
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: *laughing heartily* Like what, for what? We've waited, when was the last game, middle of March, we've waited over two months and it's like "no Philly one day, Denver the next, it is what it is!" *laughing* and I get there's no travel so you don't have to worry about that as much but it just feels like very easy to just remove back to backs-
Coley: Super easy!
Tyler: -so we could get the best basketball in these conditions possible.
Coley: Yeah I also read that it's basically gonna be like the NCAA tournament in the sense that there's gonna be multiple games per day like throughout the day. *twirls finger* Like teams sitting in the stands waiting for the next game. That i'm looking forward to.
Tyler: *laughing and nodding* yeah *laughs*
Coley: So yeah i'm happy basketball's back and i'm also glad it's like a month before guys even have to get there, so it's like, like there's still more important shit going on in the world, so you don't have to, it's not like it starts tomorrow and you have to rush back. Stuff like that. Which i'm sure was taken into consideration. I hope at least, when they say it's gonna be training camps like 5 days after the NBA finals there's no way they're gonna let that fly. Cause Woj and them were reporting some of this is up in the air, like they have a December 1st start date in mind, I feel like when they realize the champion's gonna have to turn around and start the season in like 2 weeks they're gonna push it back to Christmas like they want I think.
Tyler: It may be a thing where they start it then but like "hey those first couple weeks, use em how you want. we're not fining anybody for resting players" and also on the Lowe podcast it was like teams that didn't make it like they want some kind of thing. Like we're just off from March until December!? There's a 9 month gap in between us playing relevant games?
Coley: I'll be honest, does anyone care about those 8 teams?
Tyler: Those 8 teams do *one shoulder shrug*, anyone else? Beats me.
Coley: I feel like 6 of em might
Tyler: Dolan
Coley: Yeah he does not care.
Tyler: He doesn't even know. He's like "yeah no we didn't make the playoffs again, end of our year!"
Coley: *laughing*
Tyler: I think i'm more interested in the lottery stuff than anything. Because I know the Wizards, they're in it, they wanna make it for Beal but again with the lottery reform like we saw, the Lakers, Pelicans jumped up. Is is just in your, like the Nets, they mentioned the Nets and I think if they lose every game they could technically be in the lottery.
Coley: Okay
Tyler: Would it be worth it for them to be like lets just make the lottery and hope we jump into like a top 5 pick? Rather than just get slaughtered in the first round.
Coley: Even as just a trade asset yeah.
Tyler: Even if it's just we got the 6th pick to trade now instead of the 15th pick. That'll get us a better player. So I don't know how that'll work, nobody does I guess.
Coley: No, no. I already said i'm looking forward to being like "Marcus Smart has the most made 3's in the history of August 6th for NBA players"
Tyler: Single triples.
Coley: Yeah so i'm already looking forward to those, you know ESPN and Bleacher Report were lickin' their chops when they could really do that not sarcastically.
Tyler: *laughing nodding*
Coley: But yeah, I also I went on a Celtics podcast last week and when we were talking about the hopefulness of this coming back it's like when we last saw basketball yeah Tatum was heatin' up and that's why it kinda sucked but Kemba's knee was not good and maybe it's just one of those things where he's old, he's played a lot of basketball, takes a lot of hard fouls, maybe it's just one of those things or these 3 months off have been exactly what he needed and he's just gonna be fresh which is a huge advantage that wouldn't of happened in a typical NBA year.
Tyler: Yeah I feel like Philly has the most to gain with that.
Coley: That or Embiid's like 400 pounds.
Tyler: Nah listen the Shirley Temples will be goin' down aplenty but it was like Simmons' back was apparently like shot
Coley: Oh yeah
Tyler: So 3 months off, Horford he's just old like I don't think he's hurt, he's just old. So if he's just like 3 months off was exactly what the old man needed. Giannis, Giannis got hurt right before the end like that's what really opened up the LeBron fake MVP stuff so Giannis is just like no, i'm 100% now and i'm sleepin' in the same bed every night. We're just gonna kick ass.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: So I don't know if they've even decided are families gonna come?
Coley: I knew they were talking about it, I don't know if it's like official yet.
Tyler: I guess I just wonder to what extent people come, cause like players, coaches, assistants. Okay are you gonna have like scorekeepers? Are Media allowed? Like to what extent, cause the more people you let in the more normal it seems but it's also the more risk you open yourself up to. So, I don't know.
Coley: Yeah, ride operators!
Tyler: Yeah! Cheerleaders?
Coley: Hotel Staff, Puff the Magic Dragon!
Tyler: Yeah we're gonna pump in crowd noise like how is this
Coley: Should the Magic just actually play home games? They're right there
Tyler: They still lose 0-4 *laughs*
Coley:*laughing* Yeah I don't know it'll be
Tyler: Yeah we'll see.
Coley: I think the weirdness factor will last like those first two days and then after that we'll be very used to it.
Tyler: I think i'm more interested like no crowd noise will be weird but I feel like the camera angles, because again so much of the point of camera angles now, the point is to pipe in the crowd. So you get the feel of it, so now are they just gonna be, like I was watchin' some of the, they've been doin' the old Bulls games but kinda like movie camera setting so you only get the different angles
Coley: Yeah yeah yeah
Tyler: Like if they only do that, like okay that was different. I'd watch that but are they just gonna do the same angles and you see nobody in the stands?
Coley: Probably.
Tyler: LeBron just dunks from half court and you just hear 4 assistant coaches clapping
Coley:*starts subdued clap*
Tyler: like that, scattered applause!
Coley: I hope they do the right thing and we can really hear the players, they don't try and muffle that shit
Tyler: Yeah I would love that. I just wanna hear trash talk. Like a open gym, what you hear is what you hear. You hear squeaks of shoes and "my ball!" "fuck you" "got that"
Coley: I'm so happy Melo's involved just to
Tyler: "Gimme that shit!"
Coley: But just like echoing throughout an empty gym, perfect.
Tyler: *echoes* gimme that gimme that gimme that
Tyler: So I don't know, of course i'll watch whatever they put on but I don't know.
Coley: I almost feel like they should have special jersey's for this time
Tyler: Mmm *listening*
Coley: Like almost when you watch Summer league and they have basically pinnies. I feel like it's fall, like AAU, Spring AAU's like the real AAU. Fall AAU's like the discount AAU, I feel like this is Fall AAU.
Tyler: That's just one of those things, I have no idea. Like are they gonna do, what do you do for halftime? The teams just sit on the bench for 10 minutes, red panda still comes out in a mask.
Coley: *laughing hearty hearty chuckles* I'm looking forward to for some inexplicable reason camera guys still being right under the hoop and getting trounced by dunks.
Tyler: Kicked in the crotch by Dennis Rodman, yeah.
Coley: Yeah, just absolutely folded up on. Like *arms raise in a questioning manner* "we couldn't put him in the first row?"
Tyler: *laughing* So i've also thought like is it gonna be, I mean I know it can't be the same exact refs but it's also you don't wanna bring 30 refs there. Like again that's just opening yourself up to more risk. You can have the same 6 refs or whatever, like listen this guy hates us and this guy! Like we can't get away from this guy.
Coley: I think however many games they're planning on playing per day, that's how many ref crews they'll have.
Tyler: Mm.
Coley: And it's like listen you have one game a day and then come playoff time it'll be less obviously but yeah I think if they plan on playing 4-5 games a day they're gonna have to have 12-15 refs there.
Tyler: Then it's the thing like they're bringing their families, the coaches are gonna wanna bring theirs, the refs are gonna wanna bring theirs, any kind of media's gonna wanna bring theirs and also if we get into this tournament and week 1, one person tests positive then what happens?
Coley: Yeah
Tyler: Are we back to square one, do you shut everything down? I don't know, are you gonna test daily? Are you testing guys as they come into the practice facility? How are we gonna keep it-
Coley: I think that's what they're hoping with like the training camp aspect of it.
Tyler: Mmm
Coley: Cause everyone, I think, is starting in their original city before they go to Orlando so it's like get all your testing done there. If you find someone has it, and I understand that's not a perfect way based on how this disease works but hopefully they can just get that initial, if someone does have it, they can quarantine them and test them again in 2 weeks, whatever it is. Hopefully by the time they get to Orlando they re-test and everyone's good.
Tyler: *nods* but even then, it was another thing on Lowe's podcast it was like, if LeBron James gets this is it gonna be different rules vs if Alex Caruso gets this? Because in a vacuum it shouldn't be, but this is not in a vacuum! People are coming to see LeBron James, so are they gonna be like "well, the Lakers play next week, at the end of next friday, we'll move their game back. LeBron got enough time to quarantine"
Coley: Portland getting LA in the first round and LA doesn't have LeBron because of Corona Virus
Tyler: How'd the Lakers lose in the first round? LeBron didn't play, he had a respiratory illness. Oh yeah I do remember 2020, it was wild.
Coley: That would be all time
Tyler: The team that didn't like each other the most won. Cause the team just didn't hang out with each other at all.
Coley: They got all their Corona out of the way months ago, they couldn't get it again.
Tyler: *nodding* Orlando Magic, champions! Sleeping in their own beds.
Coley: I know Marcus had it, I don't remember if any other Celtics had it. Cause it's been fucking forever since that was knews
Tyler: I know multiple Lakers had it, multiple Nets had it, multiple Jazz had it, multiple
Coley: Thunder? Did anyone on the Thunder have it?
Tyler: I don't remember any Thunder, ideally no one gets it in training camp but if it's like first game, like oh boy we gotta test them again, we gotta test who they played against, we gotta test the referees, we gotta test everybody and if one other person amongst those test positive now what?
Coley: I mean listen Joe Rogan's testin' people as they're walkin' into the studio and he's gettin' answers before they sit down so I know there's ways to do it.
Tyler: Listen he's got capabilities the NBA doesn't let's just call it what it is.
Coley: That's true
Tyler: He's more powerful. So I don't know, it'll be very interesting, very different of course to see but it just feels like they've got this planned perfectly but they need every single step to go perfectly.
Coley: For sure.
Tyler: If one single thing goes wrong, everything falls apart. Do you hiatus again? So you proceed as normal? I just don't know.
Coley: I think i'm almost more worried that everything goes so to plan that about half way though they're like "why don't we have fans for the playoffs!"
Tyler: Yeah we can get 10,000 in here. Put 'em two seats apart. Yeah.
Coley: Yeah. We can't have the playoffs without a little playoff intensity in the building.
Tyler: Popcorn, yeah.
Coley: Yeah that wouldn't surprise me at all.
Tyler: I don't know I guess it's a thing, I don't know who it favors which I guess is a good thing. It just feels like if one Jenga piece goes wrong, this shit just comes crashing down.
Coley: Yeah!
Tyler: So maybe Rudy Gobert will get it again!? I don't know. Who am I to say!? I wouldn't wish it on anyone!
Coley: Oh man.
Tyler: *shakes head*
Coley: It's good news for now.
Tyler: Yeah i'll take it. I did think they were gonna go less than 22, i didn't think they were gonna go straight to playoffs just cause teams wanted a couple games to warm up, rightfully so. It sounds like Portland wanted 20 not 22 that was their objection.
Coley: Fuck Zion was their objection. *laughs*
Tyler: I think it's a fair objection *cracks up* He beats AD, Pelicans get hot and just win the title this year.
Coley: Yeah...
Tyler: When we get to playoffs is it still best of 7? Is it still gonna be games every other day now cause you don't have to travel?
Coley: That's what I would assume
Tyler: Yeah so we'll find out within the next 60 days or so.
Coley: Yeah I would like to watch some basketball.
Tyler: I'd watch it but I wouldn't like it
Coley: I'm not gonna tell you how to live your life that's fair.
Tyler: Would not like it but I would watch it.
Coley: *exhales* Rest in Peace George Floyd.
Tyler: Yes.
Coley: Rest in Peace Breonna Taylor.
Tyler: Yes.
Coley: Rest in Peace Ahmaud Arbery.
Tyler: Yes
Coley: Rest in Peace David McAtee.
Tyler: Yes.
Coley: If I listed everyone we'd be here
Tyler: It's billions man, Aiyana Jones, Tatianna Jefferson. Billions, literally billions. Too damn many, is how many it is.
Coley: Far too many.
Tyler: *nods*
Coley: Hopefully we're moving towards some sorts of change.
Tyler: *shakes head* Slowly but surely, it's a process and this is what the process looks like but listen one foot in front of the other, get them charged first, get the case reopened first and hopefully we get that second step from there.
Coley: And also convict, I know there's a long history of throwing the charges at them and then a few months later when everything quiets down *throws hands up* Innocent.
Tyler: Absolutely, it was a case somebody mentioned, it was exactly like Arbery. They upgraded the charge, it was no charge at first, then they had him on 3rd degree and manslaughter I think, it got upgraded to second and they even got found guilty and I think the cop did 11 months in prison and was out.
Coley: Lesson learned!
Tyler: Yeah! So again, it's one step at a time. So one step at a time, it's good news that all 4 of George Floyd's murderers or people complicit to his murder are in jail. It's good news that Breonna Taylor's case was reopened. It's good news that Ahmaud Arbery, all 3 of them, I think it was found that they were, I guess there's enough for a trial.
Coley: Yeah.
Tyler: So 3 good steps, but single steps all the same.
Coley: Yeah. Yeah it's 3 collective to add up to one step.
Tyler: And then again also, just because we've taken those 3 steps we still need people doin' and helping in whatever way you can. If you've been giving keep givin', if you've been going and protesting, keep protesting. If you've been signing petitions and sharing and talking to your people, keep doing all that. Cause again, it's one step, it's a long process. Keep doing all that.
Coley: Yeah this is far from over.
Tyler: Yup.
Coley: See everyone next week.
Tyler: See ya!
[Outro]
Juice time yuh yuh, juice time yuh yuh.
[The End]
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