Revisiting Kwame Brown's Career Best Game

With the MJ documentary in the books and the streets glowing, ranting, and raving with the best possible reviews, no one even mentioned his best move. How can that be, you may ask...how can the so called best move of his career not have been mentioned in a 10 hour documentary in which he had creative control? How can a documentary in which Jordan came out looking like the hero no matter what, have left out this major part of his career? 

I'll let you in on some trade secrets I picked up over the years, running in NBA circles and such. There are those who believe this move came from an out of wedlock affair and thus Jordan refuses to mention it, no matter the circumstances. Believe what you will, i'd have no reason to lie to you though.

On June 27, 2001, Michael Jordan made the franchise altering decision to draft Kwame Brown straight out of high school, as the 1st overall pick. Largely due to the fact that he wore the number FIVE as a CENTER, many have written him out of the history books and fast forwarded past his stint amongst the leagues dominant big men. 

On March 17th, 2004, in the midst of his prime mindst you...Kwame put up a MAMMOTH 30 POINT 19 REBOUND, domination of a performance, as his Wizards beat a Kings team...A Kings team with Finals aspirations who had taken the Lakers all the way to a Game 7 in years prior. He was at the height of his powers, a man ready to showcase his dominance to the league for years to come. Beating powerhouses from coast to coast, the Pick n Roll between him and Gilbert Arenas was ready to set the NBA ablaze. There was a brief moment in time where Stephen A and Skip were debating if the league had found their next Penny & Shaq. 

From that point on, Kwame never averaged more than 8.4 PPG again. What happened that fateful night in California's Capitol has never been truly discovered or much less explained. Will we ever find out the real reasoning behind this mysterious cliffdive or will it rest, in the laurels of NBA legend as just another unsolved tragedy?

Michael Jordan Was A Damn Maniac and It's Still Hilarious

Michael Jordan Reportedly Wouldn't Allow Horace Grant To Eat After Bad Gameshttps://t.co/cKL9jUqaqL

— TMZ Sports (@TMZ_Sports) May 7, 2020

When I saw this shit I laughed for a good 3 minutes, do you know how much of a psychopath you have to be, to LITERALLY STARVE another grown man??? WITH MILLIONS OF DOLLARS OF HIS OWN? 

The average NBA player burns about 1,000 Calories in a game and probably doesn't eat for at least an hour before the game. Horace was probably hungry as shit just sittin' on that plane, birdman rubbin' his hands together waiting for his nice juicy steak. When suddenly, Mike Jong-Un tells the waitress HE DOESN'T DESERVE TO EAT. 

via GIPHY
What happens when Horace got a bad first half? He's more nervous of the malnutrition he was boutta experience than the actual game. He goin' into the locker room and sneakin' honey buns out the back of his locker just in case.

Man i'd of been demanded a trade, just *shocking* that Horace looks like he's being held captive in MJ's basement. No wonder after that first contract, he threw up the deuces and hopped on the FIRST flight, as far south as he possibly could. Ain't boutta starve me no more pal. No siree.
You think Shaq ever starved Horace Grant?? Naw he was givin' that man as much Papa John's and Krispy Kreme as he wanted.

MJ fans need to start using this in their GOAT arguments. What's someone gonna say back to you? Exactly.

Episode 5 and 6 of The Last Dance was Plain Awesome Vol. 2

You know it. I had to. Just had to. One part, well that surely wasn't enough for the hours of art we all watched on Sunday night. In the first blog, I ranted and raved about MJ being a psychopath, the finesse king himself John Sniff, MJ's politics & more. Check it out if you haven't yet.

How stupid do you think Adidas execs felt throughout the country watching this? "God mike we love ya and all but, a shoe? We can't make those for you! A lowly rookie, kick rocks pal." By this time Adidas had been established with Run DMC money, they were bigger than Nike for crying out loud. Converse was the preeminent hooping shoe, but it wasn't like Adidas was a start up out of the garage. MJ wanted to go with Adidas, just pleaded and begged to poor Mrs. Deloris to go to Adidas. Lucky for MJ, mom knows best and when they sat down in that room with Nike, there wasn't no lettin' up....250k a year, bam...own signature shoe, off the rip. In the days where the best players were getting 100k a year that seemed risky for Nike, yeah no. First year, 126 MILLION in sales from Air Jordan. Seems like a good investment, no?

Concord 11 release line- NYC

The legend of Jordans just never stopped growing from there, they've only gotten more and more popular. Decades after his airness was the dominant scorer rockin' 2-3 in the Windy City, there are still lines around the corners for releases and online orders that sell out in seconds. Jordan carried Nike farther on his back than he did the Bulls, let's keep it real.

Wearing Jordan’s is the guy equivalent of girls wearing heels

— Joey (@JoeyMulinaro) May 4, 2020

Much like the actual documentary, we're going to randomly jump to another topic now! The Olympics, and just how fuckin' petty and unforgiving MJ was and still is. Between covering up the Reebok logo with an American flag, because fuck Harvey Schiller...or perhaps the fact that he just willed his power and kept Isiah off the dream team because he fucking hates 'em... and well he's MJ, what he says, goes.

Can we also just talk about how absurdly fuckin' good that team was? THEY DIDN'T TAKE A SINGLE TIMEOUT ALL OLYMPICS. Do you realize how bananas that is, not once did coach Chuck Daly feel it was necessary to say a single word to the team about how they were playing or maybe just give 'em some pointers, a little bit of a breather? Noope........NOT ONCE!! Those Olympics did so much for the sport of basketball, taking it to an international level and growing the game that we sometimes forget....CHRISTIAN LAETTNER was on the team over SHAQUILLE O'NEAL. I guess they overcame that adversity and were able to scrape by. What a display of fortitude and triumph.  

Sunday it seems like they're going to get into MJ's dad's tragic passing and his first retirement. Hopefully we get some unseen dingers. 

pic.twitter.com/vepL1v33Qi

— rone’s gamblin corner (@_rone) May 4, 2020

Episode 5 and 6 of The Last Dance was Plain Awesome Vol. 1

In a time of no sports and very little in terms of entertainment on TV right now, America is desperate for sports in the WORST ways. Going back and watching old games, watching highlights, shiiitt even playing a video game feels more and more realistic right now. The Last Dance really does satisfy that sports nut inside of you more than anything though, whether a lot of this is new to you or you're reliving incredible memories. I can't remember something having this much of a universal approval rating especially in today's climate of wanting to have a contrarian take for attention or whatever it may be. 

The timeline of events and jumping back and forth is pretty strange, but it does make it so you have to be watching at all times and can't be mindlessly scrolling your phone at any given time. These two episodes might have been my favorite two thus far just for the amount of sheer comedic value that came out of them. MJ was such a maniacally psychotic competitor that, no matter what, something was going to put a chip on his shoulder. He was able to get compared to a HALL OF FAMER in Clyde Drexler and see it as a slight, which quite frankly it was and that just goes to show what an absurdly unattainable level he was at. 

The gambling with the Sniff brothers, who just might be the coolest security guards to have ever walked this earth, Thomas Jefferson was just robbing MJ blind. Smoothest talker you could imagine, just a gem of a man. Rest in peace to Mr. Wozniak, our life is better for having met ya.

RIP John Michael Wozniak. He passed in January and I’m sure he has a front seat watching this from heaven! https://t.co/Vrftv1G5ly

— Estee Portnoy (@esteep) May 4, 2020

No one has ever gotten away with being a straight up dick as much as MJ did. For good reason too, 99% of the time the shit he said was just true. He knew just how fuckin' cool he was, how no one was even close to his level and that he could get away with saying just about anything. 

“I am God” - Michael Jordan pic.twitter.com/SCduBiyiup

— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) May 4, 2020

Anyone else says this? Their teammates report it to some media outlet the second they get back to their locker. But MJ really was the closest thing to God at this point in time and Randy Brown was stumped like you wouldn't BELIEVE. 

That's been my favorite part of seeing the behind the scenes footage from the '98 season, the small stuff. From seeing MJ lace his own damn shoes to choppin' it up with Scottie postgame about 4th quarter dreams of an ice cold beer. In the chaos and attention that came with being Michael Jordan, the small glimpses into him as a real human are enlightening. He didn't sign up to be a role model or a public figure but that's what came with the life of luxury, fame and oh yeah millions upon millions of dollars. He did it well for the most part and never blew up at a media member or choked someone out when lesser men might've, it's me, me I am the lesser man. 

Exceppppt, for when it came to the portion of the episode about politics. This might be Jordan's biggest media blunder of his career, but people were mad for the wrong reasons in my mind. Let me elaborate, the "Republicans wear sneakers too" comment has long been the quote you hear but many have said that it was said in jest while he was on a bus joking around. That wouldn't have made me mad with proper context, but man that election of Gantt vs Helms for the North Carolina seat on the Senate had almost nothing to do with politics. Jesse Helms was quite literally the definition of fucking racist, among other things, the man wanted to segregate schools again, get rid of MLK day and used the most uncoded slurs imaginable. 

Defeating “Liberal BLACK” lmao uhh excuse me

— Angela Rockford (@angie_goodwood) May 4, 2020

There’s no joy in Mudville tonight Jesus Christ

— Trill Withers (@TylerIAm) May 4, 2020

All in all, the two episodes gave the internet as a collective a break from the crazy ass reality that we're living in and some memes that will live on for years. See ya next Sunday for 7&8 pals.